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Summary:

Alex and Aaron have worked things out and embarked on a relationship. But how do the secretly submissive former Secretary of The Treasury and the openly Dominant Vice President navigate the world of politics and public perception?

This is part of my D/s verse for Hamilton!

Notes:

This is NOT where I expected this to go at all. The early part is going to get, um, sexier than I usually write? They're reconnecting and having some fun to reassure Alex ahead of Aaron's move to DC. I actually set out to write the first time Alex goes out as Burr's date, and we will hopefully get there eventually, but apparently a lot of things are happening beforehand!

Please let me know what you think!

Chapter 1: Chapter 1: Looking Forward

Chapter Text

Aaron Burr loves Alexander Hamilton desperately, and he wants to shout it from the rooftops.

In the first blush of new love- or newly acknowledged love, the feeling certainly isn’t new- they’re so wrapped up in each other they barely notice the passing of the days, much less the rest of the world.

Alex moves between his own home and Aaron’s, and more often than not Aaron follows. Their world condenses to just their little family, the two of them and time spent with Eliza, Maria, and occasionally Angelica.

Aaron is touched by how protective of his submissive Angelica is. After Alex’s first, disastrous attempt at proving things with Aaron are too good to be true (and Aaron subsequently helping him calm down and see that it’s okay to be happy and together) she pulls him aside for a conversation.

“That wasn’t a pretty confrontation,” the other Dom- Aaron has never been able to think of her as a switch, any more than he could Alex- says conversationally.

“Alex has had a lot of years to see the worst the world has to offer, and very little exposure to the best in people, outside of your family,” Aaron tells her warily.

“Not even from you?” Angelica challenges.

“He wouldn’t accept it,” Burr says with a snort. “Not that I blame him- I messed things up royally when we met.”

“How so?” Angelica asks, her dark eyes curious.

“The ways I could take care of Alex weren’t ways he felt like he could accept, and I wasn’t mature enough yet to learn to be what he needed. I deluded myself into thinking I was- that waiting patiently outside was enough to look after a submissive determined to plot for the Revolution, that a man like Alex would be able to accept overt care and concern, just because he clearly needed it- but I had my growing up to do and he had his, and at nineteen we would’ve hamstringed each other completely, if we hadn’t killed one another first,” he confesses. 

“You were too traditional and protective for a boy determined to make something of himself,” Angelica realizes. “I couldn’t be what he needed either- on the one hand I was too concerned about appearances and New York City high society to date someone below my station, and on the other I was too fragile in my Dominance to step up only privately.” The admission is genuine- this has gone from an interrogation to commiseration.

“Neither of us knew how to be what he needed, so he just learned to do without,” Burr says softly.

“Not entirely. Washington was a very involved parent,” Angelica says with a chuckle. “You’d never have known, seeing them together away from the office, that Alex wasn’t really his son. We had to share them with the Washingtons for holidays, even.”

“I’m glad someone stepped up,” Aaron says.

“And he wasn’t without love- he and Betsy love one another devotedly. Just not romantically. And neither of them ever thought to go looking for that, until Alex stumbled across Maria,” Angelica explains.

Aaron remembers how he’d met the lovely submissive, and he quietly wonders if Angelica is aware of quite what that first meeting probably looked like. Only Alex would’ve seen a beautiful, willing (or at least pretending to be) girl and thought, ‘Ah, you must meet my wife!’

“I wish I’d been brave enough to do what he needed years ago,” Aaron admits.

“You’re here now. That’ll be enough,” Angelica tells him. “So long as you really are in it for the long haul.”

“Nothing could tear me from him, now that I’ve got him,” Aaron assures her.

And so they’d had a deliriously happy few months, wrapped up in each other, until March approached and it became time for Aaron to begin packing for DC.

“Adams rarely did anything,” Alex points out. “You could probably just go down for a few days every other month, communicate with Jefferson by letter.”

“Do I strike you, Alex, as a man content to rarely do anything?” Aaron asks conversationally, as he goes through his closet. He’s trying to decide what clothing to take with him and what to leave in New York, with the idea that he’ll be back and forth and would prefer not to have to bring his entire household between the two locations. It helps, that he’s been staying over at Alex’s a lot lately. He’s already duplicated some things, like nightshirts.

“Yes,” Alex says mulishly. “You were always content to sit on the sidelines when I needed you to get involved. And yet you’ll do it for Jefferson?” he accuses.

“Alex, stop. You know it has nothing to do with Thomas,” Aaron tells him, striving to be patient with his sub’s fears. They’ve been having this argument for a week, and it’s growing old.

“You’ve never bothered to stand up for anything in your life, and yet you start now, when I need you here,” Alex accuses.

“I’ve stood up for plenty. I just don’t shout about it,” Aaron says shortly.

“You only became a Democratic Republican to get back at me,” Alex insists angrily.

“Not everything in my life revolves around you, Alexander,” Burr tells him sternly, nearing the end of his patience.

“Not around taking care of me, certainly,” Alex spits. “But you’ve run from this thing between us for so long. This is just you running again.”

“Alexander,” Burr barks. Alex’s posture straightens, surprised. “I am not running from you. I am fulfilling my obligations as the soon to be sworn in Vice President of the United States. And as your Dom, I will not tolerate being spoken to so rudely, or sulked at when you don’t get your way.”

Alex gapes at him like a particularly startled fish. Burr has endless patience for Alex being insecure, or Alex’s abandonment issues. They’ve spent copious amounts of time dealing with those in preparation for Aaron’s move. But this is just feeling like bratting.

And maybe what he needs is Burr to really step up and be Dominant, right now. To reassure him that things may change, but they won’t. Or to let him get out some of the stress about the transition. Either way, Aaron can do that. Not to punish Alex, just to reassure him that Aaron has things under control- has him under control- and won’t just walk away.

“I’ve been packing clothes and books and things, and the Vice President’s residence will have household goods already. But your attitude reminds me that I need to make sure I pack proper implements, as well. We’ll see what I have duplicates of, and go shopping for anything I don’t,” Aaron decides.

He generally uses the kinds of things he already has at home to spank Alexander, for fun or punishment. A ruler is his most common punishment tool, but Alex has also had a dose of the spoon a few times for acting out. They’ve played with a riding crop, and Alex quite enjoys it. Burr has considered getting a tawse. Today might be a good day to make that purchase.

“Come along, we’re going to make a list,” Aaron decides.

Aaron leads his wary sub to his office first, where they find the sturdy ruler he applies to Alex’s bottom when he’s being trying. He’s also got a shorter, flimsy one, and a thin yardstick. “I suppose if one of these would work here, I could take the regular ruler with me,” he muses. “We’d better test them.”

Alex stares at him. “What?” he asks.

“You’re going to help me make sure I have a good stock of implements here and in DC, for punishment and fun. We need to compare these options to the ruler and see if they’ll do, or if I need to get another good ruler. So bare your bottom and bend over the desk, please.” Aaron says it matter of factly. He’s not punishing Alex. He is involving him in this process, in a way that brooks no arguments and makes it clear nothing important is going to change, even if their day to day routine does.

Alex fumbles shakily with his trousers, eventually getting them down and lowering himself slowly across the desk, bare bottom raised. He grips the desk tightly.

“This isn’t punishment, Alex. You’re just helping me make decisions,” he reminds his sub, stroking his back softly. Alex relaxes a little under his touch. “Now, so you remember what you’re comparing it to,” he decides, giving Alex a smart half dozen spanks with the thick eighteen inch ruler he usually uses across his right cheek.

“Owww, I know it hurts! You don’t need to remind me!” Alex whines.

“And for being cheeky during the test, you get another six,” Aaron warns him. “Naughtiness during these trials is going to get your legs smacked, so your bottom is free for testing.”

He pushes Alex’s clothing down a little further and gives the tops of his sub’s thighs another six sharp smacks. Alex howls, “No, no, nooooo!”

He’s acting out far more than usual. Alex may not like being spanked as punishment, but telling Burr 'no' over it is unheard of.

Aaron almost hesitates, worried about what's got his sub acting like this. But it wasn't Alex's safeword. And it sounded more whiny than distressed. He's almost certain this is just Alex acting out so Aaron will pull him back, so he can feel that his Dom has him under control, even as things change.

Just in case, he drops the ruler, giving Alex's thigh another spank with just his hand, and settles an arm comfortingly across his submissive's back.

"If you don't want a spanking, the solution is to be good for me, Alex, not to whine when it's too late and you've already earned one," he scolds, peppering the backs of his sub's legs with quick little stingers.

"Owww, sorry!" Alex whines. He wriggles experimentally. Burr gives him a few more sharp smacks.

“Are you ready to be good for me?” Aaron asks. He’s pretty sure Alex isn’t done pushing just yet, but his response will give his Dom some insight into what he needs.

“You don’t have to have implements both places. I’m not coming to DC,” Alex tells him sourly.

 That… is not what Burr had expected. He doesn’t spank Alex again, instead patting his back. “I think that’s something we need to talk about. It doesn’t sound like we’re on the same page, here. Get up for me and fix your clothes, please.”

Alex stands up from the desk, fixing his clothing but not turning to face his Dom.

“Alex,” Aaron says quietly, putting a hand on his shoulder.

“It doesn’t matter if I’m good, you’re going to leave anyway,” Alex tells him defensively, shrugging off Burr’s touch before he can turn him.

“Sweetheart,” Aaron says, shocked. Since Alex apparently doesn’t want to face him, he wraps his arms around his sub from behind. He can be flexible about eye contact for what is apparently going to be a  very unpleasant conversation. But not affection. Affection, Alex is getting whether he wants it or not.

“Alex…” Aaron begins, looking for words. He’s not quite sure where their wires got crossed.

“You’re doing your duty. And how nice, I’ll be here whenever you happen to make it up to New York. Of course, with your daughter living down south now, there’s very little to draw you here,” Alex says tartly.

“Just the love of my life,” Aaron reminds him, still reeling. “Who I thought was planning on visiting me in DC, as well.”

“What? I’m just going to happen to have business in DC, when the Democratic Republicans are running the place?” Alex accuses.

“I thought you were going to come down for stories for the paper. Or hell, would it really be so awful to just say you were there to visit me?” Aaron asks.

“Yes.” Alex’s response is immediate and vehement. “I’ve spent my entire adult life hiding that I’m a sub. I’m not changing that now.”

“You don’t have to be a sub to sub, Alex. Plenty of switches openly have Dominant partners,” Aaron reminds him.

“Not me. I never have,” Alex tells him stubbornly.

“That was a choice, Alex,” Aaron insists. There’s absolutely no reason his lover can’t have a Dominant partner. He’s sure no one would care.

“And it’s my choice, Burr. Not one you get to make for me, because it would be easier on you,” Alex tells him. “You have to make a choice of your own, now. New  York or DC.”

Aaron considers this. Alex is right- he doesn’t get to decide what his sub shares with the world about himself. But that doesn’t mean it has to be all or nothing.

“I choose to fight for you,” he says. “Even if it’s hard, going back and forth. We can make it work. I choose to find a way.”

Alex shakes his head. “It doesn’t work like that. If you’re going, you’re gone. You’re leaving me.”

“Are you giving me an ultimatum?” Burr asks. He doesn’t purr the question dangerously, or challenge Alex- his lover may be submissive, but he’s got just as much say in their relationship as Aaron does. If Alex’s abandonment issues won’t allow for them living in different cities, then Aaron will have to figure out how to make that work.

Alex turns in his arms, looking at him wide eyed. “No! I’m not, I wouldn’t…” he says, looking upset.

“Alex, if me living in DC some of the time is something you cannot tolerate, you’re allowed to tell me so. You’re supposed to tell me so. You should’ve safe worded when I first started talking about the trip, if you couldn’t tell me any other way,” Aaron tells him gently.

He reaches up to stroke Alex’s hair away from his face, and the sub pulls back. “I’m not being difficult,” he insists.

“No, honey, I think you’re being upset. Which is allowed. Remember? Your feelings are yours. I want you to share them with me, but that doesn’t mean I get to control them, any more than you can,” Aaron tells him.

“So I’m in trouble for not telling you I was upset,” Alex says, nodding.

“No, sweetheart. I think you’ve been trying to show me how bothered you were, it’s just taken until now for me to understand. I’m sorry for that,” Aaron says softly. “I thought you were just upset about being apart sometimes. It didn’t occur to me that you didn’t feel like you could visit me at all in DC.”

“I’m in trouble for being a brat instead of talking to you?” Alex tries.

Aaron isn’t sure where this is coming from. Deciding to be direct, he asks, “Do you need to be in trouble?”

“It feels like I’m in trouble. I’ve been miserable for days, and I know it’s my fault,” Alex confesses. “That’s why you’re leaving.”

“Alex!” Aaron says, surprised and disturbed. “You haven’t done anything wrong, sweetheart. I wish I’d known how upset you were, so we could’ve found a solution. But you aren’t in trouble. I’m not leaving because of you, or something you did. I promised you. We agreed, that very first day- no abandonment for punishment, ever. Remember?”

“That’s not fair though, you should be allowed to leave me,” Alex says, rational even in the face of his own misery.

“Sweetheart, there is no part of me that wants to leave you. I’ve spent my life in New York- it’s been my family’s home for so long. And the hardest part of leaving the city is knowing that, a lot of the time, you’ll still be here when I’m gone,” Aaron tells him.

“You really want me in DC?” Alex asks.

“If it wouldn’t be horribly unfair to Eliza and Maria, I’d ask you to move down with me permanently. I know you said no when I threatened to make you my Chief of Staff, but I’m sure we could come up with some reason,” Aaron says. “I’ve been leaving the decision about when to go back and forth up to you, but it’s a conversation we all need to have, isn’t it?” he asks.

“I didn’t realize I had options,” Alex confesses. “So I hadn’t thought about it. But probably.”

“We’ll send the girls a note asking if we can all talk tomorrow.” Aaron stops himself, realizing he’s dictating something that should definitely have Alex’s input. “Or do you want to go back tonight and talk to them, before I come over?”

“Tomorrow,” Alex says. Aaron’s kept his arms loosely around him for this entire conversation, and Alex burrows into the contact now. “I know we still have to figure out how it works… but I hadn’t really thought about you wanting me with you,” he admits.

“Of course I do. You’re the best part of my days,” Aaron tells him. Alex snuggles closer, and he kisses the top of his sub’s head.

Chapter 2: Chapter 2: A Plan Forms

Summary:

Now that the air is cleared, they resume their "game" with the implements. Alex gives Aaron an idea.

Notes:

You guys, I have NO CLUE where this is headed for the next little while. I have the shopping written, then I know what happens once Aaron has been in DC a few months. SO I'm very open to feedback about where it's going and what you're hoping for! Lemme know!!
Thanks!

Chapter Text

Once Alex is ready to pull back from their cuddle, Aaron says, “Now, should we go back to working on the implement packing list? Or save that for in a day or two?”

“You were serious about that?” Alex asks, looking surprised.

“Absolutely. You know how frustrating it’s been to need something in one place and have it in the other, here in New York. It will be infinitely more frustrating when what we need isn’t just a few blocks over, but days’ journey away,” Aaron tells him. “And anyway, I think it could be fun.”

Alex looks at him doubtfully. “You have weird ideas of fun. But I guess if I’m really visiting, I need to help you decide what to pack,” he allows.

Aaron kisses him deeply. “Then back over the desk with you, sweetheart, and let’s evaluate our ruler options.”

Alex pauses, hesitating. “You’ve already reminded me what the regular ruler feels like,” he reminds Burr.

He has, indeed. And earlier, he was trying to give Alex something firm enough to push against, with this little game. But that’s not what his sub needs, right now, so he reevaluates his goals. “Then let’s compare this little one,” he says, picking up the smaller, shorter, lighter ruler. He flexes it in his hand and feels that it’s got a weak spot, about four inches in. If he’s not careful, he’ll break it on Alex. He grips over the weak spot, just in case.

Alex still looks wary, but he gamely lowers his clothing and gets back into position. Aaron strokes his back before he begins.

“How does this feel?” he asks Alex, giving him a sharp volley of swats. It’s awkward, gripping the ruler so far down, and he’s sure Alex gets little to no sting from it.

“Awkward?” Alex offers. “It’s light. And you usually use the ruler to actually punish me. It feels like if you really whacked me with that one, you’d break it on me.” He shivers as he says it, sounding more dreamy than horrified at the idea.

Aaron can work with that. He slides his hand deliberately to the end of the ruler, gripping it lightly. He’s no longer protecting the weak spot from bending as he spanks. “Really?” he says, musing. “You think if you were being a brat,” he brings the ruler down sharply on Alex’s bare cheeks, “and I were really annoyed with your attitude,” he continues to spank as he talks, “I might break,” a hard swat, but it doesn’t give yet, “this,” another one- he thinks it’s about to crack, “flimsy,” he continues spanking between words, “thing across your bottom?”

He couldn’t have timed it better if he tried. He spanks down hard as he says ‘bottom’, and the ruler gives, breaking suddenly with a satisfying, “Crrack!” 

Alex gasps, his hips jerking forward sharply. Aaron puts the broken ruler aside, running his hands gently across Alex’s cheeks. He’s checking for splinters- he really shouldn’t get into the habit of breaking implements on his sub’s backside- but he makes his strokes teasing, causing Alex to arch up into the contact.

“It broke.” Alex sounds dazed.

“It did. Not a good implement, then. We need something that will stand up to your naughty bottom.” He’s still stroking Alex’s cheeks. Alex pushes up into his hand as Aaron uses his nails to trace the red mark he left with the ruler when he broke it.

Aaron ‘tsks’, giving Alex a light swat low across his cheeks. “So greedy. I just broke a ruler on your bottom and you already want more, don’t you? I’ll have to make sure whatever I pack can match your stamina. Luckily, I think this next one might be up for the task.”

He picks up the yardstick. It’s longer, and he’s going to have to step back to really swing it. He strokes Alex’s back softly before he does, not wanting the sub to feel bereft, He pats the yardstick across Alex’s bottom, gauging his shot.

Alex has not so much mentioned in passing as outright whined that he’d like Aaron to be rougher on him in play. He’s taken the crop out for fun a time or two, and Alex loves leather, but he hasn’t done as much hard impact play as he knows his sub wants- usually pain is just one sensation he builds, to enhance the others.

Alex has an intense pain tolerance. He’s scoffed at Burr’s punishments for that reason, because Aaron never comes anywhere near giving him all the can bear in punishment. But that isn’t the point, as he’s explained over and over to his sub- it isn’t about breaking Alex, punishment is about learning to do better, making amends, or sometimes just catharsis. He doesn’t mention that the emotional impact is intense enough for his sub- mixing those feelings with serious pain would be too much.

Aaron has been hesitant to play hard lest his sub twist the two up. But Alex has whined more than once for bruises- Aaron won’t be leaving any today, but he can take his beautiful sub just a little further, and build a mood that gets him the rest of the way mentally. Breaking the ruler already has him a good way there.

“Hmmm,” he muses, patting Alex just a little harder with the yardstick and making him jump, “I haven’t used this on you before. It’s a lot longer. Almost like a cane. I’ll be interested to hear what you think of it.”

With that, he gives Alex a sharp crack with the yardstick, deliberately going for sting over force by keeping the blow light but flicking his wrist.

“Yeow!” Alex yelps, jumping. He stands halfway up before resuming his position over the desk.

“I think you’ll earn a lot of extras if I use this thing on you,” Aaron says, giving Alex a flurry of sharp little whacks low on his left cheek with just the end of the yardstick, until he’s twisting his hips trying to get the spanks to land somewhere else. “You just can’t seem to keep your bottom still, can you?” he asks.

“I’ll be still! Just, ow, somewhere else!” Alex yelps.

“Hmmm,” Aaron pretends to consider this as he circles Alex, approaching him from the other side. “I do like symmetry. I suppose I should even up your color.”

He does just that, giving the right cheek the same treatment. It’s a little unwieldy with his left hand, but he manages, and Alex seems to appreciate it. He’s wriggling still, and his breath has gone stuttery.

“Yes, that’s a good color on you,” Aaron tells his sub, who preens at the praise as the spanking pauses. Aaron taps him again with the yardstick, crossing both cheeks this time. “Hmm, I’m interested in your thoughts. What kind of situation could you see me spanking you with this in?” he asks leadingly. Giving Alex a chance to tell him where he wants this to go next.

“When I’m being really, really bratty and you need to take me all the way down,” Alex tells him. “I can’t even stay still when you spank me with it. You’d… you’d need to tie me,” he suggests.

They’ve wrapped Aaron’s cravats around Alex’s wrists before, but that’s as far as they’ve gone into bondage. It’s an interest they share, but Theodosia hadn’t liked it, so Burr doesn’t have any cuffs lying around, and he’s never actually gotten around to going shopping for toys for this particular submissive.

An idea begins to form- this could be a very good way of reassuring Alex and fulfilling a fantasy at the same time. He puts down the yardstick. “Up, and fix your clothes,” he tells Alex.

His submissive stays down. “I’ll stop, I’ll be still! I’ll be good!” he promises.

Aaron perches a hip on his desk and guides Alex up. “You’re being so good for me,” he says, stroking his sub’s hair. “But you’re right, I do need to be able to tie you, for some of the things I want to do to you. Some of the things you want me to do. And if I’m only going to have half my clothes in any one closet, we should probably stop being so rough on my neckwear. So I’m thinking we need to go shopping,” he says, stroking Alex’s back.

Alex looks up with wide, hopeful eyes. “Cuffs?” he asks.

Aaron nods. “And a second crop, I think. We’ll see what else we decide we need. But you’re being my very good boy, and I think you deserve some fun new toys.”

Alex preens under the praise, looking up at him with wide, trusting eyes. Something occurs to Aaron. “You’re under,” he says. “At least partially. Are you okay leaving the house like this?”

Alex blinks slowly, considering. Just thinking about it brings him back up, his fear of exposure drowning out his trust in Aaron. He’s sorry to see it, however glad he is he thought to ask.

“Thank you,” Alex says immediately. “I would’ve gone, and I wouldn’t have thought about it, until later. But I’m not, really. Not where someone we know might see.”

“That’s my job when you’re under, sweetheart. To remember what you need and what you’re comfortable with, and make sure you’re okay- in the moment and afterwards,” Burr reminds him.

“I think that’s why I can go under at all,” Alex muses. “Because I know you will.”

“I shouldn’t have suggested shopping. I’m sorry I ruined the scene,” Aaron tells him.

“Are you kidding? You were amazing. I never thought talking about being in trouble could be so hot,” Alex tells him. “And who says it’s ruined? Can’t we… shop normally, and pick back up? No use wasting the build up,” he says with an incorrigible grin.

Aaron smiles at him. “I suppose we could,” he agrees. “Get your coat.”

 

Chapter 3: Chapter 3: Shopping

Summary:

Alex and Aaron go shopping for new toys.

Notes:

So, I had fun imagining the shop- I never realized how many modern products rely on things like silicone! This chapter also contains sex, so if you want to give that a pass, stop reading when they leave the shop. It's possibly the most graphic thing I've written, and I was nervous to post it, hence posting on Saturday instead of Friday! Sorry about the delay!
Please let me know what you think! Encouragement appreciated!

Chapter Text

Aaron knows a shop across town where they probably won’t run into anyone they know. He’d found it when Theodosia was about to get married, and had asked for advice as she picked out her own implements. His daughter had been embarrassed enough discussing such things with him- she hadn’t wanted to risk running into anyone who they’d invited to the wedding!

He has no idea what the store is like, beyond that Theo had said it was ‘more than adequate’. So he’s surprised when they walk in.

There are dozens of types of implements, arranged by sensation- obviously by someone who understands pain can have many flavors and many functions.

There are all kinds of cuffs and restraints as well, from light, decorative chains that would break with a whisper to heavy, thick leather straps joined to completely immobilize a sub.

Most shops of this nature are run by one, maybe two skilled artisans. He’d hoped a leatherworker would have both cuffs and crops to choose from, but hadn’t expected to also find an array of wooden implements, as well as what looks like a tailor set up to work on custom scene attire by appointment.  The shop has clearly brought a group of artisans together under one storefront.

Alex's eyes glaze over as he takes it all in. He looks overwhelmed. Aaron presses against his back, gripping his wrist surreptitiously. “Okay?” he whispers.

“Wow,” Alex says, making Aaron chuckle- he’s so rarely seen the other man at a loss for words.

They agreed on a cover story, if they need one, in the carriage on the ride over. It made Alex feel more secure, so Aaron is all for it. They’re pretending Aaron is getting back into the dating game, and Alex is offering advice. Alex’s ‘you could get this and…’ will be him describing what he wants, not what Aaron could do to another sub. And Aaron’s ‘d’you think this would be good?’ will be checking in with Alex’s comfort level on things that grab his eye. They’ll be refering to the imaginary sub as ‘she’, since neither of them are interested in genital torture- it further separates the reality of what they’re up to from the cover.

Aaron hadn’t anticipated just how well stocked the store was, or how excited Alex would be by the possibilities. The trick now will be keeping his sub from going into subspace, from sheer anticipation and overload. Alex has far more experience with vanilla sex- John had truly topped him occasionally, but they’d been young and at war- he’s had very little exposure to toys.

Aaron sees the way Alex’s eyes flit around, and makes careful note of what his sub’s gaze lingers on. Restraints- expected, and the purpose of their trip. Some of the leather implements- also something he’d anticipated Alex liking. He gulps when he looks at the dildo section, which isn’t something Aaron had considered but sounds good to him, and then surprises Aaron by looking surreptitiously at the cock rings, obviously trying to hide his interest.

Alex wouldn’t enjoy actual denial. But he craves intensity, in every aspect of his life. And there are highs Aaron could take him to, with orgasm delay, that they simply haven’t explored yet. He makes a mental note, a plan forming.

A sales clerk- a pretty submissive boy wearing a thick chain around his wrist, sleeves pushed up to show it off- approaches them. “Need help finding anything, folks?” he offers, friendly.

Alex looks briefly startled, and Aaron steps smoothly forward. “I think we’re going to look around, first. My friend has offered to advise me, but if we run into something he doesn’t know about I’ll look for you, …” Burr trails off, giving the boy a chance to offer his name.

“Sam! Samuel. Let me know. If you need help, or if you ever want to share a sub,” he offers with a cheeky wink. Aaron feels Alex startle at the obvious flirtation. Samuel blushes, taking Alex’s surprise as disapproval. “Sorry if I’ve overstepped, sir. Sirs.” He first addresses Alex, then includes Aaron in the apology, tilting his head down briefly. “All in good fun, of course. I mean, not that I didn’t mean it-”

“It’s fine,” Aaron says, turning a still gobsmacked Alex toward the restraints. “We’re both in a committed relationship, or I’m sure at least one of us would take you up on it.”

That appeases Sam, who leaves them to their shopping with a cheery wink and a promise to help if they need anything. Aaron gently guides Alex to a quiet corner near the restraints, whispering, “He thought you were a Dom, sweetheart. That’s a good thing.”

Alex nods. Aaron wonders why he was so blindsided- he’s certainly seen enough submissives proposition Alex. When they were younger, submissive girls all but threw themselves at the dashing Revolutionary soldier- though Alex tended to only go to bed with switches. The Revolutionary Set hadn’t been particularly picky about their bed partners, though they had sometimes shared them.

Regardless, he refocuses their attention on the restraints. “What do you think?” he asks loudly.

Alex looks around, picking up a cheap pair of wrist restraints made of fabric with clips sewn on. “You really only need the wrist. These are nice because they can be attached differently- to each other, threaded through something, or to anchor points,” he says, pointing to the different chains you can buy as add ons.

Aaron shakes his head. “I like the idea of the flexibility as far as how I use them, but I’m not buying something cheap like that for my submissive. I’d worry the stitching would give out if she pulled, and these look like they’d be uncomfortable.” He wraps one around his own wrist and pulls, showing how the edge of the fabric digs into the skin.

“These are worth the money,” he says, picking up the same design but in thick leather, that actually feels like it might be padded.

Alex licks his lips. “Those are nice,” he agrees.

Aaron takes the black cuffs with their clip style attachments, then picks two matched shorter lengths of chain and a longer one. He can attach the clips to each other or use either chain length on them. Or he can attach the shorter lengths to each wrist and an anchor point. He gets a couple of extra clips as well. They must have someone who exclusively works with metal, between the many and varied chains and the frightening looking plugs he wants nothing to do with.

On second thought, he gets a second of the longer chains as well. He can clip it in a circle around a bedpost if he finds himself somewhere he can’t install anchor hooks. Like the Vice President’s residence- though Jefferson is far less reticent than he is, and probably already had all manner of structural improvements made for sexual activities. He wonders if it will bother Alex, realizing who originally lived in the home.

Aaron’s gotten lost in thought and his sub has wandered off. Alex is drifting toward the implements now, looking over the crops. While Aaron watches, he tests a few on his own leg, selecting a favorite. Aaron moves toward him, but is distracted by a flogger made like a cat o’nine without the knots.

He looks them over, and Sam appears at his elbow. “If I may, sir?” the sub asks.

“Any recommendations you’ve got about these, I’m all ears,” Aaron assures him. He’s never used a flogger before, and he’s fairly certain Alex hasn’t either.

“Start by looking at the size of the individual tails. Thicker is going to be more thud and warmth. Thinner ones are more sting and snap,” Sam tells him. “Then the intensity is magnified by how many tails it has.”

“Thank you,” Aaron tells him, and the clerk offers to take his selections so far to the counter for him while he continues to browse. He happily hands over the cuffs and chain, making a couple of small requests for other things he’d like Samuel to wrap up with his purchases.

Aaron picks out two floggers- both with about a dozen tails, but one with wide, flat suede tails and the other with light, braided leather. Alex realizes he’s lost track of him as he’s finalizing his choices and wanders back over, crop in hand.

“This is a good one,” he says, flexing it to show Aaron.

“Very nice,” he tells his sub. “I got distracted by these.”

“Those look nice.” Alex licks his lips. “I- I think she’d like them. Either one.”

“I think I’ll get  both. Good to have options, you know,” Aaron says. Alex nods dumbly.  Aaron takes the crop from him, stroking his wrist as he does. “Why don’t you go wait in the carriage? I think I’m ready to pay.”

Alex nods, escaping to the relative safety of the carriage. He’s obviously anticipating each of the things they’ve picked out, and nearly overwhelmed with it.

Aaron brings the rest of his purchases to Samuel, who has already wrapped up his extra things- he’s trusting Samuel’s recommendations on a few things, in the hopes of surprising Alex- and the young clerk finishes wrapping his purchases in brown paper for him and tells him the total.

Aaron boggles, but only slightly. Yes, it’s a lot of money, but he can afford it, and more importantly Alex is worth it. He fully expects to wind up buying a second pair of the cuffs, but he wanted to make sure Alex really likes them, first. He may also wind up getting some custom length of chain, once they’ve played with them for a bit.

Alex is quiet when Aaron joins him in the carriage with their packages. “What do you suppose we’re having for supper?” Aaron asks, making ordinary small talk as if he has no idea where Alex’s brain is.

“Me. You are having me for dinner, as soon as we get home,” Alex tells him, borderline desperate.

They don’t actually wind up unwrapping any of the new toys. Alex is a whirlwind of hands and mouth as soon as they’re away from prying eyes, and Aaron takes his cravat off and immediately uses it to tie the submissive’s hands in front of him, just to have some hope of keeping up.

Alex likes that, and it turns out stopping in the middle of the scene when he’d suggested shopping hasn’t wasted the build up at all.

When they’ve got their clothes (mostly) off, Aaron strokes Alex’s backside posessively. “I can still see the red spot where the ruler broke,” he tells him.

Alex’s eyes darken. “That’s why I focused on leather implements, today. I need something strong enough to rein you in without replacing my implements every other week. I’ve got to keep a tight grip on you.” Aaron pulls Ale’s bound arms around his own neck as he speaks, pulling them closer together. “Otherwise who knows what kinds of trouble you’d get into?”

Alex ruts against him eagerly. “Greedy boy, you can’t even wait, can you?” Aaron teases him. “I love how intense you are, how passionately you chase everything you want, in bed and in politics. You’re never satisfied,” he tells his sub wonderingly, catching his mouth in a rough kiss to taste that intensity.

“I used to think it was a curse. I thought I’d break anything I unleashed my full… self… on. But you can handle me, can’t you?” Alex says, pressing his forehead into Aaron’s shoulder as he continues to rut against him.

“I didn’t even know it, but I spent my life becoming a man who could,” Aaron tells him. He tumbles them toward the bed, landing on top of Alex with one of his knees spreading the other man’s legs. “Maybe I should get out those cuffs we bought, see if I can get you under control that way,” he threatens playfully, reaching for Alex’s own cravat, which is still partially around his neck. They’d abandoned removing Alex’s shirt when they realized Aaron had bound his hands over it. Now, he takes the cravat and loops it through the other, tying Alex’s hands to the headboard.

As he leans forward to make the knot, his cheeky sub rolls his hips upward, demanding contact. This is the thing Aaron loves so much about Alex-his sub has never confused ‘submissive’ with ‘passive’. Aaron is letting him find friction where he can, driving both of them crazy with it. And Alex is indulging. And yet he’d made no attempt to use his hands, from the second Aaron had begun to bind them.

Alex somehow knows exactly what he wants, when Aaron isn’t even sure how to articulate it. They’re a perfect pair, and Aaron’s found brand new levels of intensity in Alex’s bed, regardless of which actual bed they share. Because really, Aaron’s bed- his life, everything he is- is Alex’s now.

Aaron lets his sub find his friction against his hip, Alex’s ejaculate streaking across his own hip into his pubic area. Aaron laughs at that, delighted and playfully menacing. “You’re going to pay for that,” he tells his sub, nibbling his way up Alex’s oversensitized body before straddling the prone man. “Clean me up,” he orders.

Alex knows what he wants, and he turns the ‘cleanup’ into the most gratuitously messy blowjob Aaron has ever recieved. When he finishes, he rolls to the side, going to untie his submissive and finding to his amusement that he’d apparently never finished the second knot. Alex’s hands aren’t tied in place- he’d just left them there, because they were meant to be. He wonders if the sub even realizes he’d done it, and decides not to ask.

It’s unbelievably hot, the idea of Alex restrained by his will just like he would be by actual restraints, and Aaron tucks the thought away to play with later. He remembers the delicate little chains that had looked like they’d break if you breathed on them- what would it be like, to tie Alex like that? Where he could so easily escape, where he has to work not to get away.

He leans into Alex, who, released, has curled around him. It’s late afternoon. He still has packing to do. He ought to get back to work.

Instead, he pulls his submissive closer. He and Alex have each other. The rest, he’ll figure out later.

Chapter 4: Chapter 4: A Visit with Maria

Summary:

Alex needs to process, so he goes home to the girls. Eliza's out, but Maria helps him realize some truths.

Notes:

GUYS. This fic... just keeps changing on me. To begin with, it was planned as a two shot, mostly dealing with introducing TJ and Mads. Then I decided we deserved some context for HOW Alex got comfortable with going to DC with Burr, and it expanded. I imagined it very angsty, with the original two-fer a more upbeat end. I posted chapter one with no idea where it was going, just figuring it would end with the original two shot.
Then, since I hadn't written ahead, I asked YOU GUYS. Cloudyfoots and Sid, especially, but EVERYONE who told me what they wanted to see- it's metamorphosed again. I've been super inspired by everything you guys have suggested- I'm a couple of chapters ahead again, now, though I'm going back and forth on some of them- and it's become much more a fic about growth and discovery between people who love each other, not just static characters who figure their love is enough but aren't great at communication.
This chapter IS angsty- I decided some of Alex's context needed to come out of Alex's head, or rather mine, and get discussed, so he can grow and heal. But guys, good stuff is coming, with some of our favorite supporting characters- including one we haven't seen in the 'post-war' part of the series or the show!

You guys' feedback is SO inspiring. Thank you, everyone who has ever taken the time to comment. Please, keep telling me what you think and what you want to see. I love it!

So, Happy Indigenous People's Day, have some fic!

Chapter Text

Alex feels better in ways he can’t quite articulate when he wakes up from his nap. He’s definitely derailed Aaron’s entire day, between the scene, the shopping, and the sex, but he isn’t even slightly sorry. He’d needed his Dom, and he’s been told it’s Aaron’s job to be there when he needs him.

Indeed, Burr is awake, apparently, but had stayed with him while he slept. “Well, good morning, beautiful,” the Dom says.

Alex startles. “Morning?” he asks.

“Just teasing,” Aaron assures him. We should probably see about supper soon. I’m going to try to get a little more packing done, too.”

“You had a lot you meant to do today, besides focus on me,” Alex says, not quite apologizing but acknowledging that Burr is behind- he knows his Dom. Aaron has a schedule for this move. And Alex throws a wrench in it.

Aaron nods, kissing his head. “Some things are more important,” he says. It’s an acknowledgement and an agreement, but just like Alex wasn’t apologizing, Aaron isn’t scolding. That’s one of the things he likes about his Dom- before, he’d always thought Aaron was absolutely rigid about stupid things. He’d have described him as having a stick up his ass. Had done so, in fact.

But however much Aaron likes plans and routines, he’ll go against them, for something more important. He understands priorities. And he seems very proper, but he’s not the kind of old fashioned Alex had always been afraid he would be. Alex doesn’t have to be a ‘perfect sub’, the kind that shows competitively in seedy events with no regard for safety, where enduring things that do them real harm is the point of the challenge, not an accident. The kind of competitions Washington had once tasked Madison with getting Congress to outlaw, with limited success.

Alex can just be Alex. And Burr wants the best of him, doesn’t allow him to languish in pettiness or temper any more than he’d ever gotten away with it with Washington around. But Burr wants Alex, he doesn’t try to change him.

Now, Alex just hopes Aaron is serious about respecting his boundaries, about keeping his orientation and their relationship secret. Because he’s absolutely not ready to even hint at being a submissive. The thought of Jefferson finding out makes him shudder.

“You okay?” Aaron asks.

“Got lost in thought,” Alex assures him. He sits up. “If you’re going to pack, I’m going in to the paper for a little while, just to see what my writers have turned in, while no one is around to bother me with questions.”

“Sounds good to me. We’ll find something cold in the larder for supper when you get back,” Aaron says, kissing him as he gets out of bed.

They pass one another clothes in companionable silence, as they find them scattered around the room. Alex tosses Burr his own cravat, putting on Burr’s himself. He can’t quite explain why he does it, only that he wants to.

When they’re dressed, Aaron goes down to his office to continue packing, while Alex leaves the house. He’s not actually interested in going to the paper, but he’d been strangely reluctant to tell Burr the truth of his plans.

Still, he swings by the paper quickly, because he said he would. One of the writers has an interesting article going about how the Democratic Republicans are likely to affect commerce and trade. It’s on the reporter’s desk, not in the pile for Alex to review or even the one for the editor to make changes, but he leaves notes on it anyway.

On second thought, he doubles back and adds, ‘I love where you’re going with this. Keep it up. -A Ham’ He’s been told his unerring focus on making things better often overlooks acknowledging what’s already good, and he’s trying to do better, as a business owner. His writers pour their hearts and minds into their work, after all.

Check in at the paper done, he heads home. He wants to make sure the girls will be available for a conversation tomorrow.

“Alex! We weren’t expecting you- Betsy’s off with Dolley, I was planning on snacking instead of doing dinner, but I can have them throw something together,” Maria says when he walks in.

“I can’t stay. I promised Burr I’d be home for supper. He doesn’t know I’m here,” Alex admits awkwardly. He loves Maria- like a sister, he thinks, though he doesn’t have any- but he’s not sure how to talk to her about this.

“Is something wrong?” she asks, suddenly alert and worried.

“No! Or, I don’t think so. It’s less wrong than I thought it was? Maybe? But it might be leading to things going much, much more wrong,” he admits.

He should just make sure they’ll be available for dinner tomorrow and go. “Aaron and I need to talk to you two tomorrow. Are you free for supper?”

“We are, and you are both welcome to come here and join us  But if that were all it was, you could have just sent over a note. What is it, Alex?” Maria asks, putting a hand on his arm.

“I don’t know. I think I just need to process?” he admits.

“You do that best in your office, come on,” she says, taking him by the hand and leading him into his office- where she promptly flops across the couch.

Alex stares at her, not sure what they’re doing.

“Tell me. Start with whatever the first thought in your head is. Pace. Make notes and fling them around. Whatever works for you. Just like you would if you were working on a new policy,” Maria advises.

“Burr wants me to visit in DC,” Alex says slowly.

“Okay, that sounds… I mean, I knew that. He’s said that. Did you not know that?” Maria asks.

“Not really! It seemed more like an abstract idea. Like when Dolley comes over, and she says we should really all have dinner, and I say it sounds nice. It doesn’t sound nice, it sounds like torture. But the polite thing is to say that it sounds nice,” Alex tells her, gesturing wildly. “Just like the polite thing was to suggest it.”

“Dolley isn’t suggesting dinner to be polite- you know what, no. Put a pin in that. We will talk about Dolley some other time. For now, we are talking about Aaron. So, Aaron was assuming you would be with him in DC, and you were assuming he was just being polite?” Maria asks. Alex nods. “And Betsy was assuming you were leaving us to be with him, now that you’ve found love. Everyone is assuming they know what everyone else is thinking.”

“No!” Alex tells her, immediately horrified. “I wouldn’t- and Aaron wouldn’t ask me to. That’s why we need to have dinner. So we can all talk about me going back and forth.”

“Good,” Maria says, looking relieved. “That’s good, Alex. That will make everyone feel better.”

Apparently, everyone but Alex had assumed he would go to DC,with just as much surety as Alex had assumed he couldn’t possibly. He digests that. “If I go to DC… I have to have a reason.”

“Visiting your Dom is plenty of reason. He wants to see you, Alex,” Maria tells him gently.

“I know that, ‘Ria. I’m not worried about him. I’m worried about having an excuse for anyone else who notices I’m in DC. I don’t want to be sneaking in and out at night, hiding from everyone so no one finds out I’m there. Like some ghost haunting the Vice President’s house,” Alex tells her disdainfully.

“And ‘visiting your Dom’ isn’t a good enough reason to give anyone else who wonders why you’re in DC?” Maria checks.

“That would require telling people he’s my Dom,” Alex counters.

“There’s nothing wrong with being submissive, you know,” Maria reminds him. “And even if you really were a switch, you’re allowed to have a Dom, so long as your wife is okay with it. And you’ve already been through an adultery scandal, to protect us. Wouldn’t it be better to let yourself be happy, without having to hide?”

“It’s not the personal repercussions I’m worried about, it’s the political ones,” Alex explains.

“I thought you were done with politics. You said you didn’t regret your choices, when we were almost exposed, but that you weren’t willing to spend the rest of your life defending them and repeating that lie, and you were going to reach the people directly to affect change, instead of going through the government.” Maria tilts her head, considering him.

“I created the Treasury, as it exists today. If I’m a sub, some of the people who support it will start doubting it, because they’ll doubt me.” Alex paces the room as he tries to explain. “I can never be seen as weak. Morally questionable is actually better. Weak would be worse than corrupt. Politicians understand corruption. It’s already winding its way through our government- Adams is a clear example. Although one thing I’ll say for Jefferson- he’s crazy, he’s selfish, he’s wrong, but he’s doing what he thinks is best, not trading favors. But I can be morally bankrupt, and still make sound policy. I can  be shady, or a bastard- literally or figuratively- and still make sound policy. But if they think I’m weak? If they get a hint that I’m a submissive, and decide that my mind isn’t razor sharp? They’ll dismantle everything I’ve built. I won’t be able to affect any kind of change, for anyone. No one will listen to me.”

Alex whirls to look at Maria, who is watching him with her mouth open in surprise. “I never realized just how worried you are, or why,” she admits.

“I’m out of politics. No one is going to get me removed or fire me for who I love. But what I’ve built is more important than who I am, ‘Ria. I’ve done it- I’ve built something that’s going to outlive me. Phillip is gone. Our nation is the only legacy I’ve got left.  And… so much of what I did, I did with the General. I can’t let his legacy be tarnished by my choices. I can’t!” he says, sitting heavily beside Maria.

She takes his hands in hers, pulling him closer. “Washington would be so proud of you. He would also want you to be happy. We just need to find you a compromise.”

Alex burrows into her side. “I never was any good at those.”

“You managed, when you had to,” Maria reminds him, petting his hair. “We’ll figure it out, now.”

“I don’t want to figure it out. I want to move to a tiny town out West where no one knows our names or cares, and live, just the four of us, and never explain ourselves to anybody,” Alex tells her.

‘Ria hums. “Do you really?”

“No,” Alex admits sulkily. “I’d be bored out of my mind, not living in the city. I just… want what I want. And I want it to be easy, just once.”

“I know,” Maria tells him, petting him. “And it never is. You want hard things, and you make them happen. I wish it weren’t always so hard.” She turns to incircle him in her arms, resting her chin on his head. He lets her, feeling oddly protected. There’s nothing Maria can do to make any of this easier. But at least he’s not alone.

“Someone’s going to find out,” he confides, his voice small. “I’ve known that since the first time he kissed me. The reason I never had a Dom, before, even when Betsy told me to find one was because I knew… eventually someone would find out.”

Maria doesn’t argue. She just strokes his back. “I decided it was worth it,” he tells her. “I needed him. I never would’ve made it this far, without Betsy and you. Without Angelica. But I’m a sub. I need to feel like I can give over control, sometimes. It was different, when I had the Washingtons. Having ‘parents’ around, even if they weren’t really mine, made it so much easier. It was still hard, the General was always trying to convince me to find a Dom… but it was doable.

“And we all take care of each other. Our little family. I tried to convince myself that would be enough.But I don’t just need someone to take care of me, I need someone to take control.” It feels better, saying it out loud. Even if it makes him feel weak.

Maria doesn’t judge him. “I know, honey. And you deserve that. And now you’ve got it. And screw whoever doesn’t like it.”

Alex laughs quietly into her shoulder. “I wish it were that easy.”

“Most people only see what they want to see, Alex. That’s how men like James can do what they do. People ignore things that are messy, or confusing. As long as no one who would try to blackmail you finds out, you should be fine,” she assures him.

Alex sits up enough to kiss her cheek. “I’m sorry no one paid better attention, back then. You deserved for someone to notice. You deserved to be seen and heard.” He threads their fingers together.

“I am, now. With Eliza. And with you. Our family takes care of each other, isn’t that what you said? We do. And we’re damn good at it. I’m happy now, in a way I never dreamed I’d be, when I was trapped with James.”

She stills, and Alex slows his breathing deliberately. He’s not sure if she’s thinking or if she’s having a flashback, but sometimes when she does have one, she can mimic his or Eliza’s breathing and get it under control.

“I believed a lot of lies, then. Because someone with power over me told them to me. That I was weak, and undesirable. That my only value was as a thing to be used and hurt. That no one would ever want me if they couldn’t hurt me. Who told you what you’re like as a submissive, Alex? Whose voice says no one would trust you or listen to you, if they knew?” Maria asks, her voice low and intense.

“John thought hiding my orientation was a good idea. Of course, he wanted me to come out with a big ‘Fuck You!’ and tell everyone I was a submissive, once I was powerful. Once they listened to me. Prove anybody who thought subs couldn’t lead wrong. He’d have wanted me to do it right after Yorktown,” Alex says.

“But you had the idea to hide who you are before you met John. I never met him, but it sounds like he supported your desire to hide your orientation and prove subs can do anything, not that he was convinced subs can’t,” Maria says.

“John said I was the most brilliant person he’d ever met. He said I’m proof subs can do anything, and that it doesn’t matter where you’re from,” Alex agrees. It doesn’t hurt as much as it used to, to remember his friend. His Dom.

“Then it’s not his voice, telling you what people would think, is it? He’s not the one who told you your voice didn’t matter because of your orientation,” Maria points out.

He isn’t. It’s a lesson Alex learned a long time ago, on the island. “I don’t want to talk about it,” he says shortly.

Maria looks at him levely. “I think you need to.”

“It’s over. Why relive it?” he settles back down against her shoulder to avoid having to look her in the eye.

“Because it’s not over, for you. You’re still listening to that person, and letting them run your life. And I’m not going to stand back and let those lies hurt you, anymore. Now, tell me.” Maria scratches her nails through his hair as she speaks.

He can do this. It’s only Maria, after all. If anyone understands the people who belong in nightmares, it’s her.

“He was our landlord, when my father left. I don’t know… my mother worked for him, as a maid. Afterwards. To keep a roof over our heads. I don’t know for sure, but I don’t think that’s all he made her do. She cried, sometimes, and there were marks- I was too young to understand. My brother was a Dom- she found him an apprenticeship. It was just us, two subs. Left alone. So he got what he wanted,” Alex admits.

“Men who take with no regard for anyone else are the worst kind of scum,” Maria tells him.

“He was that. When we were sick… obviously, she couldn’t work. So when she died… I went to live with my cousin. I thought I was through with him. My cousin was a good man, but he was under too much pressure. Adding a teenager to care for… I don’t know if he stuck around longer to be there for me or if I was what sent him over the edge. Maybe both,” Alex admits.

“Either way, you aren’t responsible for him. He loved you, he just couldn’t face everything on his own. That’s not your fault,” Maria reminds him.

“Well, I thought I’d be out on the streets in a few days. There’s no organized system on Nevis for orphans. Families do what they can. If there’s no family, children find work or they wind up on the streets. I was out of family. I was contemplating whether I was going to have to give myself to someone, just to have a place in the world. Then he showed up,” Alex explains.

“The landlord?” Maria checks.

“Yes. I was sorting through my cousin’s bills- he’d had money trouble, even without an extra mouth to feed. And then he showed up, and he let me know my mother had owed a month’s rent. And he’d been looking for our family, to collect it,” Alex says. He winds an arm around Maria’s waist, resting his chin on her shoulder as he speaks.

“I told him I had nothing but bills and a looming eviction, and that there were no adults in the family left, and wished him the best of luck getting that money. Told him to tell me if he found somewhere to get it, I’d be as eager as him to hear about how. He backhanded me. Told me not to speak to my betters like that. He said that if the only asset my family had left was me, he’d put me to work to pay off the debt,” Alex tells her.

“I told him I wasn’t going to be much use, without a way to feed or house myself. I think I told him good luck getting money from my corpse. He said I could live in the servant’s quarters at his house, and serve him. Said subs made good manservants, and he could use a ‘fresh’ one.” Alex’s contempt for the older man is clear in his voice.

He takes a deep breath. “Then he saw all of the papers I’d laid out- all of the notes I’d made, letters I was working on to people my cousin owed money to. He read them, and he said that on second thought, I’d better come work for his business. He hadn’t known I could read, and he didn’t want me snooping around the house,” Alex tells her.

“I literally didn’t have a penny of my own. And he kept charging me for things- rent, or he decided I looked too shabby and needed new clothes. All sorts of things. And he could charge me whatever he wanted, even if I knew it was more than it should cost. I worked hard- I didn’t mind settling my family’s debts. But I never managed to get ahead of what I owed him. I thought about just disappearing, I even tried to once.” Alex buries his nose in Maria’s hair before continuing.

“He found me, and he beat me. Oh, he beat me all the time- if he thought I’d made a mistake, or was too slow. If he didn’t like my attitude. Often, because he thought I’d made a mistake and he didn’t like my attitude when I corrected him. But he nearly killed me, that day. Afterwards, he came to see me where the cook had me in bed, recovering, and he told me he would, of course, be billing me for the work that didn’t get done the days I was out.”

Alex shakes his head. “I told him I wasn’t going to work for him anymore, that I’d go to the police if he tried to stop me. He told me no one would listen to a bastard, orphan, submissive wandering around by himself. And even if they did, no sub’s word would stand against a Dom’s. I told him I had proof- I had scars. He said he’d tell them that I was disobedient, that he needed to reign me in, and they’d be horrified, alright- by how badly I behaved, to deserve those scars. He knocked me across the room, at some point, and I blacked out. It’s all a little fuzzy, honestly.”

“He was a monster, and he was wrong,” Maria tells him passionately. Alex looks at her face, surprised by her tone- she’s crying. He pulls her closer.

“What he did was wrong, but he wasn’t wrong about what people would think. The servants in his house whispered about me, as I healed. About what I’d done to get hurt like that,” Alex tells her.

“They were under his thumb too. They weren’t a fair assessment of reality,” Maria insists. “When I was ready to divorce James- no one thought what he did to me was right. He’d always said it was his right, but the men- the Doms- who handled my case were horrified. And your landlord was every bit as bad, if not worse. Because you were a child. At least I chose to marry James, even if I didn’t know what he was like. You never had any choice at all.”

“What happened to me was nothing like what you endured,” Alex argues.

“It was, Alex. It was. And it was wrong," Maria tells him softly.

Alex doesn't argue again. He doesn't see the point. He'd been a child suffering at the whims of a cruel adult, certainly. But he'd also been difficult, in ways Maria could never be. No one who's ever met him could fail to understand someone wanting to take a whip to him.

"You shouldn't let him dictate to you anymore," Maria says after a long silence.

"I don't." Alex doesn't understand what she means.

"You let him decide what people will think of you. You're a force of nature, Alex. No one who has ever met you could mistake you for weak," she tells him.

"Maybe." He doesn't know what else to say. It's worth considering what she's saying, but the idea is too raw to really contemplate, just yet.

"Healing is a process. It isn't linear and it isn't fast. You and Betsy taught me that," Maria assures him.

They stay curled up on the couch together for a long time, just not alone as they get lost in their own thoughts. Alex is grateful for the time and closeness, but eventually he knows he needs to head back to Aaron's.

"Aaron will worry if I'm not back soon," he says, standing.

Maria stands up as well. "Be safe getting home." She kisses his cheek. "We'll expect you at six for supper tomorrow?"

He hugs her goodbye. "I'll see you then. Have a goodnight. Tell Betsy I was sorry to miss her."

On the way home, he considers Maria's words. Of course, horrible people tell horrible truths, as well as lies. But maybe it's possible to be respected, and openly have submissive tendencies. It's worth exploring, at least.

And he knows at least one politician who doesn't think less of him for submitting. Burr comes out of his office when he hears Alex, smiling. "Get caught up?" he asks easily.

"I went by the house. Talked to Maria," he explains.

"Good." Aaron smiles at him. There’s absolutely no hint of reproof for the unscheduled stop- he really does treat Alex as an equal. Alex wonders when that will stop surprising him. "You look like it helped."

"It did," Alex admits. "Though I think she thinks we're all idiots, for waiting until you were about to leave to discuss my travel situation."

"Maybe we were. But we'll get it sorted out," his Dom tells him, pulling him close. "Now- it's late. Let's find something in the larder and have a quick supper before bed."

Alex agrees, and when Burr offers, he kneels, letting the other man feed him. It's settling. He's always eaten to stave off the old demon of hunger, before. He's never really taken the time to appreciate food. But when his Dom feeds him, his brain slows down and appreciates flavor and texture, and even a simple meal is delicious.

They go to bed not long after dinner, and when Alex wraps himself around Burr to sleep, he feels just a little less like he's got to cling to the other man so he doesn't lose him. It's a good feeling, he decides.

Chapter 5: Chapter 5: Dinner With The Girls

Summary:

Everyone sits down for dinner, and Maria puts her plan to take care of Eliza and Alex into motion.

Notes:

OK, guys, this is a long chapter. And this is spiraling into a really long fic.

I know myself- if I cram TOO much of the larger story into this fic, I'll start to pressure myself and give myself writer's block.

So, which do you think would be better:
Option 1: Shrink the scope of this fic to just getting ready for Burr's move? Including at least one cameo with someone who doesn't usually appear in Act 2. Details and world building and scenes and soft moments. Then I'll definitely write the fic where they deal with being apart, and the fic where Alex visits, etc. Just as more manageable chunks.
Option 2: Stop writing so much detail and so many little moments, and make this more of a plot driven piece- get Burr sent off, already, have them send a couple of letters back and forth, and get Alex to DC with him to visit.

Full disclosure: I already wrote the cameo and kind of want to use it. It sets up a recurring reappearance and TBH, it's cute. Plus I'm more character driven than plot driven, in what I prefer to write and read. But this update is over 4,000 words. I don't want to write so much I overdo it for you guys! So let me know what you'd prefer, structure wise, please.

Thanks!

Chapter Text

Maria has a tried and true method for making Eliza feel better when she's out of sorts: cuddling. Her beloved is an incredibly tactile person, and physical affection works wonders for her mood.

So when Eliza gets back from dinner with Dolley, she draws her into the sitting room. "How was supper?" she asks, settling them both stretched out across the settee, where she can hold her beautiful love.

Betsy smiles listlessly. "Good. She's a whirlwind, right now, visiting the tailors here in town while servants pack them up in Virginia for the move to DC. James is going to be Secretary of State, so they need to be there full-time, not back and forth like he has been while he was in Congress."

"Is Dolley moving with him?" Maria asks.

"Yes," Eliza says. "I mean, it makes sense. Her Dom is there." The fact that she says Dom instead of husband makes Maria very aware that Betsy isn't thinking only about her best friend anymore.

"Alex came by earlier," she reveals.

Betsy startles, turning in her arms to see her face. "What? Why? Not to say goodbye yet, I hope…"

"He wanted to ask if we could all have dinner tomorrow and talk," Maria explains. "And he needed a sounding board."

"Is everything alright?" Betsy asks, propping herself up with a hand on Maria's shoulder to see her face more easily.

"Getting better, I think. Apparently, everyone has had different expectations of this move. You thought Alex was moving with Aaron, Alex thought he wasn't going at all, and Aaron thought he'd travel back and forth. Alex and Aaron realized they were at cross purposes, and now they want to talk to us and come up with an actual plan," Maria says, stroking Eliza's hair soothingly.

"Oh." Eliza's response is quiet, but surprised. "Oh, that's wonderful! Am I terrible for thinking so? I know I shouldn't want him with us instead of Aaron, but I can't bear to lose him entirely. At least some of the time…"

"He'll be home. For what it's worth, neither of them can imagine taking him away from you entirely. Aaron may be his Dom, but you're his wife. I've always respected and valued the place your marriage holds in your heart and I really think Aaron does the same with Alex," Maria explains.

She feels Eliza begin to shake in her arms, and she holds her love as she cries. She understands the impulse- Betsy has been getting steadily more heartbroken as Alex's expected departure approached. She's been hurt that he hadn't discussed it with her, and that he was spending so much time away from home when she'd thought him about to leave her entirely. But she'd been too glad to see him finally happy to tarnish it by complaining. The relief is clear in the way she relaxes into Maria, crying out how hurt and upset she'd been to lose him.

Maria supposes she should be jealous, holding her lover while she cries for a man. Even if he is her husband. But Alex and Betsy's relationship is complex and unique. They are truly life partners, even if they have only been sporadic lovers.

They each flourish knowing the other is at their side, to support and believe in them come what may. That foundation has held both of them up through everything life has thrown at them, has made Alex a home while he built a nation, given Eliza a firm enough footing to accept her nature and fall in love. They are who they are because of what they’ve given each other, and she loves them both too dearly to ever resent that.

With that in mind, Maria puts her mind to making the conversation tomorrow as painless and productive as possible for everyone involved. Burr will be wary of overstepping and Eliza will be prone to cling, but Alex will need a balance he’ll be too afraid to seek out on his own. He’s come alive, thanks to Aaron, in a way Maria feared he never would again when they lost Phillip. 

When Eliza is done crying, she guides her upstairs and prepares a bath. Maria washes her beautiful love, wiping away her worries and worshipping every inch of treasured flesh. They’re gentle with each other as they tumble into bed, still damp and warm, and when they’re sleepy and sated they fall asleep wrapped tightly around each other.

The next morning, Maria begins to plan. “Let me be the hostess, tonight. You just be his wife,” she tells Eliza over breakfast.

“You’re up to something,” Eliza says, kissing her as she puts the tea on the table.

“Just taking care of the people I love,” Maria tells her mysteriously.

After breakfast, she begins to plan. She gives the housekeeper some suggestions for dinner- something light, that doesn’t have to be served promptly- and turns to the entertaining.

Alex isn’t a guest, of course. And by now, they usually just treat Burr as another resident when he’s at the house. But tonight, she’d like to put everyone at ease.

She’s gotten them all drunk on punch to embrace Alex’s love of cuddle piles before. That won’t work, this time. Aaron knows by now how strong she makes the punch, for starters. But they all indulge her as shamelessly as they do Alex, however reluctant she usually is to let them- she can work with that.

So she gets out far too many bottles of wine for dinner, and spends too long on place settings and arranging a new centerpiece. By five forty five, everything is in place, but she wanders the house keeping busy anyway.

When the boys arrive, she lets Betsy get the door and hears her tell them, “Maria’s been a whirlwind all day, getting ready for you. I think she’s decided tonight needs to be special.”

She hears the concern in Alex’s voice when he says, “That’s because of me, probably. She knows I’ve been… stressed about Aaron leaving. And probably making too big of a deal about it.”

Eliza and Aaron remain chatting in the hallway, while Alex braves the parlor. “‘Ria?” he asks from the doorway.

“Oh, good! Alex. Decide what wine we need for an aperitif, please, I’ve been getting ready all day and I’m too tired to make any more decisions,” she tells him, sitting on the couch heavily.

Alex looks over the bottles she has on the sideboard and picks one she knows he favors, though it’s too dry for Eliza, so they’ll have to open another when she comes in. Perfect. Like a good lover’s-husband/sister-wife, he pours both of them a glass and brings her hers.

“Thank you,” she says, snuggling against him where he sits down beside her.

“You didn’t have to go to so much trouble,” he tells her, reaching past her to put his glass on the end table and rubbing the tension out of her shoulders.

“I didn’t really mean to. It started as not wanting Eliza to worry over anything, and then suddenly I was worrying,” she tells him. “It’s not like we have guests over. Just family.”

“Well, you just sit back and relax now. I’ll serve drinks, and then we’ll have a low key dinner,” he assures her.

“Bossy,” she teases. He digs a thumb into the spot on her shoulder where she always stores tension. “Ooh, on second thought, I’ll do whatever you say, just do that again.”

He does, committing himself to soothing her imagined stress away. Alex really does take wonderful care of her. She almost feels bad for tricking him, but she’d known that if she seemed stressed, Eliza and Alex would both be distracted from their own nerves. So far, it’s working.

“Wine me,” Alex requests a moment later, and she picks up his glass and twists to hold it to his lips, his fingers never leaving her back. Frequently, when it’s just the three of them, one of them either winds up trapped under someone else or lounging in such a way that they can’t easily reach their drink, and they’ve all gotten good at helping each other.

She’s not sure Burr’s ever witnessed it, though, given the way he laughs when he walks in. “I’m not sure they need us after all,” he tells Betsy. “They seem to have things under control.”

Maria hears the smile in Eliza’s voice as she turns to set Alex’s drink back down. “Room for two more?” she asks.

“I’ll get us drinks,” Aaron offers.

“No!” Alex hops up. “I know what everyone likes, I’ll get wine, you two sit. Aaron, do that thing you do to my neck when I’ve been writing too long on Maria,” he orders, going over to the side table.

Aaron looks at her gamely, but doubtfully. “If I may?” he asks, gesturing to the seat beside her. Maria smiles at him, turning to give him her back and wondering what, exactly, he does to Alex’s neck that makes him sound so enthusiastic.

Eliza comes around the couch to kiss her across the arm of it. Maria smiles at her reassuringly. “Join us. Alex can handle drinks. I’m tired. I want to rest a bit before we have supper.”

Eliza leaves her field of view, and the way Burr adjusts beside her makes Maria fairly certain her beloved has sat down. “Do I have your permission to touch your neck?” Aaron asks.

Maria smiles, surprised. Aaron is always so thoughtful- and she knows it isn’t just worry over her… sensitivities. He’s like this with everyone. “You do. I trust Alex didn’t suggest you do anything improper,” she reassures him.

“Eliza’s right here to bean me with a vase if I try,” Aaron assures her playfully. Then his thumbs dig in on either side of the back of her neck, pushing up, and she forgets how to think for a moment.

Whatever tension she’s been carrying feels like water, running out of her. She wasn’t stressed about dinner, but she has been stressed for days as Alex fretted and Betsy got quietly withdrawn and hurt. And Aaron just applies steady pressure, coaxing all of that stress out of her.

“Good. Deep breaths. Just relax,” he tells her, lightening his grip slightly and squeezing her shoulders.

She leans back against him with a huff. “I am relaxed. I am boneless. We don’t need pasta for supper, I’m a limp noodle,” she tells him. “Alex, you’ve been replaced as my favorite masseuse.”

“Why do you think I keep him around?” Alex tells her playfully, passing his Dom a glass. Maria looks over and sees that Eliza already has one. And Alex, given options, has opened different bottles to serve each of them. Interesting. 

He looks at the couch now, seeing her leaning into Aaron and Eliza to the side, watching them. “Betsy, ‘Ria’s hogging Aaron while I do all the work. Pet me and tell me I’m pretty,” he demands, retrieving his wine glass before dropping to sit on the floor between Eliza and Aaron’s legs.

Eliza leans forward to run her fingers through his hair. “You’re very pretty,” she tells him fondly, scratching his scalp. “You’d be even prettier with nice braids,” she offers, and Alex leans back into her.

“I do like to be pretty,” he says happily. He loves the feeling of hands in his hair, and Maria knows he's also fond of the wavy way his hair looks when he takes the braids out.

Aaron wraps an arm around Maria’s waist to steady her as he asks, “What have you girls been up to?” not looking at all uncomfortable as his sub gets his hair braided by his wife, while said wife’s lover cuddles into him. She’d never imagined Aaron would fit so perfectly into their family. She just hopes his job as Vice President doesn’t ruin all of that.

“Dolley has been in town. She’s getting a new dress made for the Inauguration Ball- Thomas has asked her to hostess. And her favorite shops are all here, of course,” Eliza tells him.

“That seems like as good of a first question about DC as any- do any of you want to come to the Inauguration Ball with me? Or as my guests, rather. We can split off and I’ll escort Maria if you all want to come, or Alex and Eliza are welcome to attend together…” he trails off.

“I’m not ready to go with you,” Alex tells him softly.

“I know that, sweetheart. I’m not asking for that. Just inviting you to attend,” Aaron explains.

“I don’t want to go, if I can’t go with you,” Alex decides.

“That makes sense,” Aaron agrees.

“What about you, Aaron? Do you want your family with you for your inauguration?” Betsy asks.

“Theo’s coming, with her husband,” Aaron tells them.

“That’s not what I meant. If you’re part of our family, that makes us your family. Which means we’ll be there to support you, if you need us,” Eliza reminds him firmly.

“Alex said he doesn’t want to go to the Ball-” Aaron points out.

“I’d attend the ceremony, if you wanted me there,” Alex offers hesitantly. “I mean, I’ll go to the Ball if you really want me to.”

“I don’t want you to be uncomfortable. The ceremony is what’s important,” Aaron says.

“Then why don’t we all go to the ceremony, and I’ll go with you to the Ball?” Maria offers. She’s surprised at herself- the idea hadn’t occurred to her until it was out of her mouth.

“It smooths those things along, to have a beautiful woman on your arm,” Alex agrees.

“We can go honestly as old friends. You were my divorce attorney, and I took care of Theo for a little while when she was young. No one will think anything of it,” Maria assures him, warming to the idea further as she really considers it.

“You can say you brought her so she and Theo could reconnect, if anyone asks,” Betsy adds.

“Or tell them to screw off,” Alex offers helpfully. Eliza swats him on the shoulder and he laughs.

“I usually use my maiden name when I’m in public. Nobody associates me with the Reynolds Pamphlet anymore,” Maria assures him. “Maria Lewis is just some submissive woman.”

“The most stunning submissive woman I’ve ever met,” Betsy says fondly. Maria blushes, looking down.

“I’d appreciate the company, if you really don’t mind,” Aaron tells her.

“I don’t,” she assures him. “And we can all stay in DC for a few days, and help you get settled in.”

“If anyone asks, Maria’s the one you invited to stay with you, and we’re just the friends she was traveling with. I’ll moan about Betsy making me play nice with the enemy, and admit under questioning that we cleared the air after the election,” Alex suggests.

“It could work,” Aaron says, sounding surprised.

“Maria being an old friend of yours opens another explanation for you and Alex to be seen together more,” Betsy points out. “People know she’s my friend who lives with us, even if they’ve mostly forgotten why. Or the ‘why’ they think they know, anyway.”

This is already going better than Maria had hoped it would. “And it’s a great excuse to get Alex down there with you for the inauguration,” she agrees.

“I can even write about it. One of my writers is working on something about what a change in the party in leadership will do to the economy, I really can use that as an excuse to go down, sometimes,” Alex says. “Looking into what Congress is doing and how it affects commerce.”

“And my best friend will be living in DC. I certainly can’t go visit Dolley without an escort for the journey,” Eliza points out.

Aaron’s eyes light up. “That’s perfect. That way, he’s not alone for the duration of the trip and then ping ponging between us. I don’t want Alex to feel like he’s traveling more than he’s home.”

“I’m not looking forward to the time on the road, but home is where either of you are. Any of you,” Alex corrects himself, looking at Maria.

“And Alex usually visits Martha Washington every few months. DC is a good stop-off point on that trip. Eliza goes with him as often as not,” Maria offers.

“Plus, I mean, Adams hardly did anything. Jefferson was always busy, but he made himself busy. We’re still figuring out what exactly the Vice President does, and Jefferson is pissed about me breaking rank to run in the first place- I bet he’ll be happy for me to suggest projects that take me out of DC and into New York periodically,” Aaron offers.

“This could really work,” Alex says, sounding surprised and pleased.

“Now, duration. I hate to take him away from you for over a month at a time, but the journey is a week and a half to two weeks, each way. I’d like him to spend at least as long there as he spends traveling,” Aaron suggests. “Three weeks to a month with me, then two or three months here? With me visiting in the interim as possible? And I’ll plan to join you guys here for holidays, but I don’t want to ask Alex to leave home over Christmas or Thanksgiving, if I can’t get away.”

“My Father comes to the city for the holidays, and if we’re in town we spend them here or at Angelica’s with the Schuyler family,” Betsy tells him.

“You can come to Mt. Vernon with us for the other holidays, of course. Martha will want to meet you. I mean, you’ve probably already met, but she’ll want to meet you properly, as my Dom. She and the General always knew about me- and they always told me to stop being ridiculous and find a Dom,” Alex explains. “Theo could meet us there, if she wants to. Mama M will be fine with more guests.”

“You spend major holidays with the Washingtons?” Aaron asks.

“They’re the closest thing I had to parents,” Alex tells him. “Martha’s all I’ve got left, and the grands and I trade off making sure someone visits every couple of months.”

“The grands are George and Martha’s grandchildren, who they raised,” Maria explains. “Eleanor and George Jr. They’re lovely young people.”

“Martha Washington is going to eat me alive,” Aaron says, looking shell shocked.

“She’s lovely, really. The  best sort of in-law. All she wants is for Alex to be happy,” Betsy reassures him.

“That’s what I want, too.” Aaron sounds a little fortified, at least. Maria pats his arm comfortingly.

“I can’t believe we’ve really got a plan. That will actually work.” Alex sounds giddy.

“It’s not set in stone, but it shouldn’t be. It does take into account everyone’s needs. Except… I just want it said, when I’m accompanying Alex, Maria is coming too. I don’t want to leave her here alone for weeks at a time,” Betsy decides.

“Sometimes you’ll be on your way to Virginia,” Maria reminds her.

“You can stay with me if you don’t like accompanying them to Virginia,” Aaron immediately offers. "I can ask Theo to visit at the same time, so you can see her and there are no rumors."

“Or you can come. Mama M loves you, because you make Betsy happy. You really aren’t an intrusion,” Alex tells her earnestly.

“You can decide what you want to do, on a case by case basis,” Betsy promises her, reaching over to take her hand. “I just don’t want you to think I’ll go off and just leave you, for Alex’s sake.”

“Thank you,” Maria tells her seriously, bringing their joined hands to her lips. She sits up. “Now that we’ve got a plan, I’m going to go see about dinner. Alex, assist!”

Alex dramatically holds out his hand, and she pulls him to his feet. “I was comfortable. Why can’t I say no to you?” he whines.

“Because you love me,” Maria tells him, pulling him toward the kitchen. She wants to give Eliza and Aaron a moment, if they need to talk about Alex out of his earshot.

Dinner is ready, and this naturally necessitates a different wine, so she puts Alex in charge of picking and opening wine to go with the food. He mulls over his decision for a few minutes, then opens it to let it breathe.

“This is really happening,” he says, leaning against the dining room table. 

“It is. You’ve found your perfect Dom, and he’s not going to let circumstance pull you apart. You get to be happy,” Maria tells him.

“I can hardly believe it, sometimes,” Alex admits. “Sometimes I think it’s all a dream.”

“That’s how I felt when you first introduced me to Eliza,” Maria admits. “I never thought someone would really want to be mine, and have me be theirs, without all the trappings of Dominance getting in the way. But I woke up every day and it was still real, and gradually I started to expect to be happy. Not to take it for granted, but just to feel like happiness and real love were part of my life, not just other people’s.”

That makes her think- Alex won’t be waking up with Aaron every morning, soon enough. She’s going to need to give the Dom a heads up, that Alex would appreciate frequent reminders he’s loved while they’re apart.

“That sounds nice. I thought I was starting to feel that way, then he started planning for the move, and I just… it never occurred to me that being with me was one of the factors he was considering,” Alex admits.

“I think you need to get used to the fact that your happiness is a factor for Aaron in everything he does,” Maria says softly. “He loves you, Alex. I never thought you could Dominate someone and love them, but he does.”

“Huh,” Alex says thoughtfully. “I never put it in quite those words, but I guess I never thought someone could see me really submit and still find me worthy of love. Even John, he wanted me to defeat my submission. Not accept it.”

“From everything you’ve told me, I really think what he wanted was for you to have what you wanted. Not that he thought there was something wrong with you submitting,” Maria assures him. It’s been a sore spot for Alex, the thought that John might be disappointed if he could see him now.

“Could be,” Alex tells her with a smile.

“I’ll go get our lovers, you watch the wine,” Maria tells him, kissing his cheek and going to fetch Burr and Betsy.

They have an easy, companionable dinner, talking comfortably and lingering over wine in the sitting room once more when they’re done eating. When they all begin to yawn, Alex pulls an unusually sleepy Aaron up to his bedroom, and Eliza offers Maria a hand to pull her up from the settee.

“I don’t quite know what you did tonight, but thank you,” she says, pulling Maria close before they go upstairs.

“I just gave everyone a space to be honest,” Maria tells her easily. “We all care about each other. As long as we keep communication going, we’ll be fine.”

“I should never have doubted Alex,” Eliza says. “It’s just hard, sometimes, not being able to be everything he needs.”

“You build each other up and help each other grow. And you grew so much together that you got to a point very few people reach- a point where you could go looking for everything you needed, instead of just what you could give each other. That’s a strength, not a weakness. And it’s a strength I’m grateful for every day,” Maria tells her.

“I don’t know how I got so lucky,” Betsy tells her, kissing her before the head up to bed.

Maria seconds that sentiment, deeply.

Chapter 6: Chapter 6: Making Plans

Summary:

Alex is much more involved in the ‘getting ready for the trip to DC’ once they decide the Hamiltons are coming.

Notes:

Thanks for the votes on scope- this fic is officially about the planning for the move and how it shakes up their relationship!

I love and appreciate EVERYONE who takes the time to let me know what you think! Y'all rock!

Chapter Text

Alex is much more involved in the ‘getting ready for the trip to DC’ once they decide the Hamiltons are coming. He helps Aaron breeze through packing up his office- insisting he take any book he could possibly need, because, “We have them at my house if you need a copy while you’re in the city,”- and quite enjoys helping Aaron decide which crop and flogger to leave and take.

He also insists Aaron and Maria have new outfits made for the Inauguration Ball. “They don’t have to coordinate,” he insists, “But you’re the Vice President and his date. You need to look sharp.”

Aaron has never been nearly so flashy of a dresser as his sub has become in his later years, but he does see the sense in putting his best foot forward. Maria is likewise hesitant- after the scandal of Alex’s attempt to protect she and Eliza’s secret with the Reynolds Pamphlet, plus her dislike of large groups anyway, she’s mostly a homebody and rarely goes out anywhere that requires a formal gown.

“You’re sure you’re comfortable with this?” Aaron asks her as he escorts her to the tailor’s shop Alex has made them an appointment at.

“Dress fittings, or going to the ball?” Maria asks him.

“Both. Either. I don’t want you uncomfortable for my sake, or for Alex’s,” he tells her.

“Sometimes, it’s worth being a little uncomfortable to save someone you love from feeling far worse. If I weren’t going with you, Alex would convince himself he had to, and he’s not ready for that,” Maria tells him.

“I think he half considered it, just to upstage Jefferson at his own party,” Aaron agrees. Alex had, jokingly, mentioned that it would almost be worth outing their relationship to see Jefferson’s face when all of the political rags wrote about former Treasury Secretary Alexander Hamilton instead of President Jefferson the day after the inauguration.

Based on the few meetings he’s had with Jefferson since the election, Aaron thinks he would’ve been quite put out indeed. To Jefferson’s credit, he isn’t bitter about only winning with Alex’s blessing. If anything, he’s grateful. But conversations about the Cabinet have included a lot of shouting about Hamiltonians.

“You’re my friend  too, Aaron. And you’re part of this crazy family Alex has… collected over the years. I don’t mind being there for you. I’m glad there’s something I can do that helps,” she tells him insistently. “Though I am a little nervous about Alex’s idea of formal attire!” she admits with a laugh.

The carriage arrives, and Aaron gets out and helps Maria down. The building they’ve stopped in front of is small, with a tasteful sign reading HM Tailoring- Fine Clothing For the Discerning Patriot in the window. It’s definitely the address Alex gave him, though it’s more discrete than he’d have pictured his sub choosing. He guides Maria inside with a hand on her back.

The jingle of the bell announces their arrival to an empty shop- Alex is supposed to meet them, but he evidently hasn’t arrived from the paper yet. Aaron is looking around for any sign of life when a familiar voice calls, “Alex! About time-”

Hercules Mulligan freezes in the doorway to the back room of his shop, staring at Aaron in surprise. “I’m sorry, this shop is by appointment only. My other shop, Mulligan’s, usually has a tailor available if you need help quickly, Mr. Vice President.”

“I have an appointment. We do,” Aaron gestures to Maria. “Or at least I think Alex made one.”

“He came in when I was at Mulligan’s, said he needed formal wear for one woman and one man, quickly, and he had a story for me, according to my shop girl. I just assumed it was him and Eliza. I only see Alex every year or two, anymore, but he always finds an excuse to come in when he has big news. Please, come in. Sit down and tell me what I can do for you and your submissive, Burr,” Hercules tells him politely, though he’s looking a bit wary.

“She’s not my submissive-” Aaron contradicts him immediately.

“Maria Lewis,” she says, offering her hand.

“Eliza’s girlfriend,” Herc says, looking impressed. He takes her hand, using it to pull her into a hug. “I’ve heard so much about you, I’m so glad to meet you. Alex adores you.”

“He speaks very fondly of you, as well. I should’ve known, given his one chance to talk me into a custom ball gown, that he’d send me to you,” Maria says with a laugh.

Hercules looks between them. “I think you’d better tell me what’s going on. Alex left me some thoughts about design, but I thought the clothes were for him and Eliza. Why are you here?”

Aaron looks around warily. “I sent the shop girl to Mulligan’s for the afternoon. It’s just me, here. This shop is by appointment only, where I do my design work and personal sewing, these days. No one but Alex is going to wander in,” Mulligan assures him.

“As you know, I’ve been elected Vice President,” Aaron says.

“Because Alex went to bat and told everyone how spineless you are, yes,” Mulligan says sharply. There’s obviously a lot of resentment there.

“Do you have a problem, Mulligan?” he asks mildly.

“You put my best friend through hell, Burr. If you don’t know it, you’re a damn fool, so let me be the one to tell you- Alex thought the sun shined out of your ass, and you rejected him again and again. And now, for whatever reason, he’s helping you, but I’m right on the edge of kicking you out of my shop regardless,” Mulligan tells him, crossing his arms and glaring.

Aaron moves Maria behind him before he realizes he’s done it, automatically protective. She doesn’t seem to mind- she’s obviously uncomfortable with the two Doms at odds.

“I am a damn fool,” Aaron admits, “But I finally figured out he wanted it as much as I did. It’s not perfect, with me moving for the Vice Presidency, but I am his Dom now, and I’ll do whatever he needs me to. Including letting him dress me up at the ball, since he’s not comfortable being on my arm himself. This is for him, Mulligan. I guarantee you I’m going to hate every minute of it.”

Mulligan breaks into a wide smile. “Well, if you make him happy, I can’t object to him finally getting what he wants. Just remember I was a spy during the war- you hurt him, you’ll never see the end coming.”

The warning is cheerfully given as Aaron is pressed into a one armed hug. That conversely makes it all the more terrifying. Still, “That’s fair,” he agrees. He’s glad his sub has people who will defend him, if he ever needs it.

“Now I see why Alex’s note told me to focus on silhouettes and not get married to color choices. I’d have done him and Eliza in greens. You two, I’m patriot-ing up. Burgundy for you, my dear,” he twirls Maria, “and we can do navy for you- but a splash of red somewhere, either your waistcoat or a colored cravat,” he tells Burr.

“Waistcoat, please,”  Aaron requests. “I don’t want anything too flashy up by my face. Are people really doing colored cravats?”

“It’s a new thing. Just catching on. But you’re not the wild fashion choices type. Don’t worry, I’ll tone down what I would’ve done for Alex,” Hercules assures him. “Nothing silky, but a fine fabric. Velvet?” he suggests.

Aaron would prefer a sensible wool, but… “I suppose I should occasionally live dangerously,” he agrees.

“I’d say loving Alex is living dangerously all on its own,” Maria says with a chuckle.

“And you’re accompanying him to the ball?” Hercules checks with her. She nods. “I’ll go get the sketches I’ve done for you to look over while I take Burr’s measurements,” he offers, disappearing into the back and returning with a few sheets of large, thick paper.

He chivies Aaron toward a small platform in the back of the shop. “You going to disrobe for me, Burr?” Mulligan teases.

“If I need to. Do I?” Aaron asks, raising an eyebrow placidly. Half the fun the Revolutionary Set had messing with him had always come from how deadpan he was about it. Of course, he could’ve gotten them to lay off by letting them get a rise from him, but that would’ve meant letting them win.

Hercules laughs. “Shirt and breeches is fine,” he says. Aaron removes his coat, waistcoat, and cravat, laying them on a convenient chair and stepping back onto the platform.

Mulligan is measuring his back when the door jingles again. Aaron starts to step away, assuming it’s Alex. “Stay put. Follow my lead,” Mulligan says, tugging him back into place.

Alex whispers something to Maria, then he’s through the curtain almost immediately. “Ooh, you two-” he says, his voice playfully shocked.

“Alex, I’m with a customer,” Hercules tells him sternly. “If you can’t be punctual, you can’t expect me to wait around. The Vice President needs a suit for his inauguration.”

Alex opens and closes his mouth, shocked. Finally, he says, “And you’re just… making him one?” he demands. “No questions about what he’s doing here? Nothing?”

“I assume you sent him because he’s escorting your wife’s girlfriend. Of course, I’d know more if I saw you more than annually,” Hercules scolds. He’s continued to measure as he talks, and Aaron just stays still, letting him work.

“Aaron!” Alex says, his tone borderline whiny.

“I told him my sub sent me his way to get a suit, so he’s making me a suit. What more do you want, Alex?” Aaron asks placidly. “Do you need me to move my arm?”

“Yes, go ahead and raise them. Thanks,” Mulligan says. “Now, Alex, you know I don’t allow guests to sit in on measurements, even if they’re a couple. Go wait with Maria,” he instructs.

Alex pouts furiously at them both. “You aren’t even a little bit surprised?” he demands.

“It’s been over two decades coming, ‘Lex,” Mulligan tells him.

“Hercules is a fine tailor. It makes sense you’d send me to him for something so important. The only thing I was surprised about is that you’d be so thoughtless as to drop an announcement like this on one of your best friends without any warning or even bothering to be present. But we’ll discuss your manners later. Now, do as he says,” Aaron scolds.

Alex droops a little, obviously displeased to be dismissed and unhappy to have them put out with him. But he goes obediently, closing the curtain behind him. “He wasn’t really being rude. It’s hard to find time for each other, anymore. And sad, with John gone and Laf across the ocean. I’m just pleased he trusted me to know, honestly,” Hercules tells him quietly when they’re alone.

“He’s not really in trouble. I am going to remind him to warn me if he’s sending me off to face large men who have every reason to be angry about my failure to be there for him over the years, but you’re the first person outside of our families we’ve told. That’s huge. How he did it doesn’t change that,” Aaron assures the tailor. “And I do think he waited to arrive because he was nervous about actually telling you, and wanted me to do it for him.”

“And you have to admit, it was a very Alex thing to do!” Mulligan says with a laugh.

“That it was. Full speed ahead, always,” Aaron agrees.

Mulligan makes quick work of the rest of his measurements, organizing them while Aaron redresses. Then, he accompanies Aaron back to the main shop floor to get Maria.

First, Mulligan bodily picks Alexander up, holding him close in a bear hug. “I’m so glad you found someone,” he says quietly into Alex’s ear. Burr turns away, letting them have their moment.

“Betsy and ‘Ria and Angelica were all there when it happened. After that, you and Laf were the first people I wanted to tell. I’ve got a letter written to him I haven’t been able to convince myself to send,” Alex admits.

“He mentioned in his last letter that you’d been quiet lately,” Herc says.  “Write to him, please. Even if you can’t tell him yet, just write to him. He misses you.”

“I will,” Alex promises. “And I think… If I can tell you, without the world ending, I can tell him.”

“All we ever wanted was for you to be happy. Completely happy,” Mulligan tells him.

“I really am, Herc. I can just be me, and he doesn’t try to change it- he wants the real me,” Alex tells him, quietly reverent.

“Even when you’re a little secret keeping shit,” Hercules tells him fondly. “Now, go make up with your Dom, I have a dress to make, and I need measurements!”

Aaron turns back to see Alex standing on his own feet, looking fondly at Mulligan. “Thanks, Herc,” he says. The bigger man squeezes his shoulder fondly before releasing him.

“Now, Miss Lewis?” Hercules says, offering a hand to guide her to the fitting area.

Aaron stops him thoughtfully. “Hercules prefers to do measurements privately. Are you comfortable with that?” he asks Maria.

She hesitates. She’d seen him angry earlier, and it had made her wary.

Hercules smiles gently. “Alex can come with you if you want,” he offers.

“You just said-” Alex challenges.

“I’ll make an exception for a lady’s comfort, not for your need for attention,” Hercules tells him fondly.

“I’m alright, thank you,” Maria says. “Aaron and Alex will just be on the other side of the curtain.”

“And you don’t have to take anything off. I’m not going to have time to build you a corset for the dress, so we’ll build around one you usually wear,” Hercules assures her, leading her to the platform. “Luckily, it’s all about drape these days, not tightness…” his voice trails off.

Once they’re alone, Alex turns to face Aaron. “I’m sorry I sprung Herc on you. And left you alone to give him the news with no warning,” he admits, looking down.

“Does it feel better, knowing he knows?” Aaron asks.

Alex makes a face. “It didn’t when I thought you were both mad at me. Herc isn’t, though. Are you?”

“I’m not mad. I’d rather you were more considerate in the future, but it sounds like you know what you did wrong, and these are extraordinary circumstances,” Aaron tells him, pulling him into a hug. “I forgive you, just this once. But from now on, you read me in when you’re springing things on people, if I’m involved.”

“Unless I’m surprising you,” Alex argues impishly.

“You may only surprise me with Eliza’s permission,” Aaron says, immediately realizing how badly that exception could go. Alex opens his mouth to argue, so he adds, “Or Angelica’s, if you’re surprising us both,” he allows, anticipating Alex’s next objection.

“Does this mean I’m not in trouble?” Alex asks, fluttering his lashes dramatically.

“I told you you were forgiven, didn’t I?” Aaron tells him fondly, stroking his hair. “Though I have a plan to work on your manners and communication skills later,” he says, his voice a silky purr.

Alex shudders. “Oh, no!” he says, obviously delighted.

“I’m going to tie you up when we get home,” Aaron promises. “And I’m going to drive you crazy. But since you like to keep secrets, you can’t speak. Except for two words. Please and Princeton. You can beg, or you can safeword. Other than that, you’ll just have to take whatever I give you.”

Alex stares at him glassily. “Can we go home right now?” he begs.

“No. We can’t leave Maria, or leave without telling Hercules a proper goodbye. Then we have to get Maria home, and it would be rude not to stop in and talk to Eliza… we won’t be home for a while,” Aaron tells him.

“You devious…” Alex apparently can’t decide what to call him.

“Yes, dear?” Aaron says placidly, sitting in one of the chairs in Mulligan’s waiting area.

Alex sits in the one beside him. “I’ll go mad,” he moans.

“It'll be worth the wait,” Aaron assures him.

Maria is none the worse for the wear when she and Herc emerge, laughing together over some story Herc is telling about Alex. She shows him one of the sketches he'd brought her, batting Alex away when he tries to look over her shoulder.

"You'll get to see it when it's done," Herc tells him.

"I did not plan for you two teaming up against me and I don't think I like it," Alex announces.

"Tough," Herc tells him cheerfully. "I'm just glad poor Eliza finally has someone sane in the house to talk to!" he teases.

"I am the definition of responsible and trustworthy," Alex tells him.

"For big things. The nation. The Treasury Department. Not for little things, like dinner and sleeping," Hercules reminds him.

"I'm getting better," Alex insists.

"He actually is," Maria admits. "We almost never find him napping in his ink well anymore. It's been great for the laundry budget."

"Burr's a good influence, then!" Hercules says with a grin.

Alex shrugs impishly. "He just makes going to bed more interesting."

There was a time when the implication would've horrified Aaron, for the impropriety of it. But everyone present is well aware he's sleeping with Hamilton.

Still, no use letting him think he's gotten away with it. Aaron swats his sub sharply and tells him, "Hush, you, or the only thing you'll be taking an interest in tonight is a corner!"

Alex whirls on him, outraged. "You said-"

"Then hush and be good," Aaron says quickly, not wanting Alex blurting out specifics in front of the others. He does still have his limits, after all.

Hercules laughs at them. "Careful, Alex. I think you've met your match. Now, get out of here, I've got way too much sewing to do if I'm going to have these ready when you leave!"

He hugs them all- including Aaron, which surprises him- holding Alex close for a long moment and whispering something to him before he sends them off.

That absolutely wasn't how he'd expected this day to go, but Aaron can't say he minds. Alex is obviously thrilled to have his friend's blessing, and it does make Aaron feel good to know Hercules, as protective as he always was of Alex, approves. Though he's not sure how he feels about the fact that Mulligan knew all along what Alex wanted from him, while Aaron himself had no idea.

Coming to terms with those wasted years is a process, though, and one that's still ongoing. For now, they see Maria safely home, spend a few minutes with the girls, then return to Aaron's home- where he makes everything he promised Alex earlier come true.

Chapter 7: Chapter 7: A Promise Kept

Summary:

Aaron made a promise, at Hercules's shop. It's time he kept it.

Notes:

No actual sex here, folks, but lead up to it. Skip this chapter and next if you want to miss the scene entirely, or just the next one if you want to skip the actual sex.

Chapter Text

Once they're safely home and alone, they immediately and by unspoken accord head straight for the bedroom. Aaron has a promise to keep, after all.

They haven’t had a chance to play with the restraints yet, so Aaron wants to check them over before they begin. Alex looks interested when he reaches into the cupboard where he’d stored them, along with a few of the secret surprises he’d picked up at the shop.

“Nope!” Aaron says, turning to face him. “I need to get things ready, and you need to learn some patience. You get what I give you, today. You don’t need to know what’s coming.”

Alex looks like he’s not sure if he’s offended or turned on. “I can’t just not be curious!” he insists.

“You can learn to control your curiosity. Might as well practice now,” Aaron tells him. He takes out a pillow from the bed and sets it on the floor at the foot of it. “Come on, kneel.”

Alex moves forward to obey, but hesitates. “This isn’t you… teaching me a lesson for springing things on you, is it?” he checks.

Aaron kisses him deeply. “No, this is me rewarding you for taking a big step and letting Herc know about us. I don’t mix sex and punishment, Alex, not seriously. Playfully, if you act up during a scene? Sure. But if you’re in trouble, I’ll tell you. Not spring it on you in bed,” he promises.

“Okay.” Alex nods trustingly and lowers himself to kneel on the cushion.

“Now, I don’t want you peeking. Can you handle that, or should I blindfold you?” Burr offers.

Alex shivers. “I can handle it, but, um, I’d still like to talk about blindfolding, later,” he admits, obviously intrigued.

“I can do that. I think you’d like a blindfold, for the same reason you seem to like restraints. Taking away one sense, or way of being involved, makes everything else more intense. We haven’t played with sense deprivation yet, but we can absolutely do that some time,” Aaron assures him.

“It wasn’t on my likes list because I’d never considered it, really. Leaving myself at your mercy? But I guess I am, anyway, really. Maybe not a blindfold with restraints, at least at first…” Alex muses.

“We’ll work up to it, Alex. Nothing you don’t want, I promise. And I’d never want to ruin something you do want, going into it too hard. For today, the goal is just anticipation. You don’t know what I’m planning or getting ready for. You can either pick a spot this way to focus on,” Aaron gently turns Alex’s head away from the bed, “Or close your eyes. But you have my permission to look for me, if it makes you anxious not knowing what’s going on. Not if you’re curious- just if you feel worried or nervous. Can you do that?”

Aaron had been being practical, putting Alex on his knees. But this is an easy, safe warm up to blindfolding, later- letting Alex see the potential benefits of the heightened anticipation. Alex licks his lips nervously. “Once we get started…” he asks.

“Once we get started, I want you to see everything I’m doing to you. This is just while I get things ready,” Aaron assures him. “And you can stop. It won’t interrupt the scene. You don’t have to safeword. Just say my name when you look for me, so I know you’re done.”

Alex nods. “Closing my eyes would be more like a blindfold,” he says, and does so.

The very first thing Aaron does, once Alex’s eyes are closed, is pet his hair. Alex hasn’t previously had an adverse reaction to unexpected contact, so he figures it’s safe. The sub rolls his neck back, leaning into his touch, and Aaron spends a moment petting him, just for reassurance.

Alex has always had a deep, desperate desire to know, in any context. He doesn’t like not knowing things- it frustrates him, but Aaron has also seen how it makes him feel vulnerable, not to be able to anticipate someone else’s next move. This is a big gesture of trust, and Aaron wants to honor that.

He stops petting, cupping his sub’s head. “I’m going to go lay some things out. I will not leave the room. You know what to do if you get nervous,” he tells his sub, waiting until Alex nods minutely to let go of him. He can't resist kissing his sub before forcing himself to step away.

He doesn’t really need all that many things for the scene he has planned. He wants to make Alex feel good, above all. He clips the wrist restraints to the longer chain, threading it through the headboard. This way, he can chain Alex to the bed, but his sub can turn over as needed.

He gets out the soft flogger with the wider suede tails, that they’d decided to leave in New York. Alex had really enjoyed it, when they’d tested it on his back. Aaron’s planning on giving it a much more thorough workout today. He sets it aside, out of sight.

Next he pulls back the quilt, folding it at the footboard out of the way. He leaves the remaining pillow on the bed, for Alex’s head. He considers removing his clothes now, then ultimately decides it will be more fun to get Alex ready and then make him wait. He gets out one of the hair ribbons Alex uses to tie his hair back when he sleeps, putting it in his pocket, and decides he’s ready.

He comes to stand behind Alex, making noise as he moves so as not to startle his sub. Alex leans back into him automatically. “Alex,” he says softly. “We’re ready to start. You can open your eyes now.”

He feels the way Alex relaxes further as his eyes open, but his sub doesn’t turn his head or try to look around. Aaron slips to his knees behind him, rewarding him by tilting his head back for a kiss. “Good boy,” he says. “Now I’m going to get you ready, okay?” he checks.

Alex’s, “Okay,” is soft, trusting. Alex is eager to get started, but for once he seems content to let it happen, instead of trying to tease or goad Aaron into anything.

He starts by braiding back Alex’s hair. He does it for two reasons- one, Alex loves having his hair played with, and it’s a good chance to touch him casually, before things get too intense. Also, with Alex’s hands bound, it will be harder for him to move it out of his eyes, once they get going.

Alex will have some freedom of movement, of course. The restraints aren’t locked into place, they’re affixed by a chain. But his range will be limited, depending on his position. And Aaron doesn’t want him worrying about his hair, anyway.

Once he’s finished with Alex’s hair and Alex is putty against him, he reaches around his sub to unfasten his cravat, touching him as much as possible as he unwinds it and sets it aside. Next, he slides Alexander’s coat off of his shoulders, running his fingers teasingly down his arms as he does so.

Alex tilts his head back to rest on Aaron’s shoulder as his coat comes off, and Aaron slides it between their bodies and sets it aside on the post of the footboard to deal with later. Then, he kneels up, pressing his chest against Alex’s back without dislodging his sub’s head as he begins working at Alex’s buttons.

He undoes the waistcoat quickly, but takes his time with Alex’s shirt, stroking every bit of skin as it’s exposed. Alex tries to press into him, to guide him to do more than gently pet, and Aaron shushes him. “We’ll get there. Be good for me, sweetheart.”

Once he has Alex’s shirt unfastened, he stands, walking around his sub and guiding him to his feet. He lowers Alex’s braces and slides his shirt and vest off, setting them aside with his coat. Then, he unfastens his sub’s breeches, kneeling to undo the buttons at his knees and guide him to step out of his shoes before tugging them down. Alex steps out of them readily, and Aaron stands back up and rubs soft circles on his hip bones, pressing lightly at the sensitive spot just underneath the jut of bone.

Alex arches into his touch. “Aaron, please!” he begs.

Aaron tsks at him, giving him a quick spank on his underwear clad thigh. “Ah, ah, ah. You have two words tonight- what are they?” he reminds his sub.

“Please. Princeton,” Alex recites.

“Exactly. You may safeword. You may always safeword, regardless. And I’m being benevolent, and letting you beg. But you only get to use ‘please’. Not my name, not descriptions of what you want. Just ‘please’,” Aaron instructs.

“Or what?” Alex challenges. It’s like Alex, to want to know what’s at stake. As little as Alex considers consequences before he acts, he does like to know all of the variables, in any given situation. They’ll have to work on that- on trusting Aaron’s judgement, instead of needing to know. But they’re already trying a couple of new things today. Aaron decides to reassure his sub.

“That didn’t sound like either of your words,” Aaron tells him. He steps closer to Alex, speaking directly into his ear. “I might just give you a few spanks, as a reminder.” He demonstrates, wrapping an arm around Alex’s waist to steady him and giving him a flurry of hard smacks on the seat of his underwear. Alex presses into him, his hardness trapped between them.

“Or, if it looks like you’re enjoying that too much, I might make you wait.” Aaron squeezes the spot he’s just spanked, then steps back to see Alex’s face.

Alex’s expression is a mix of emotions. Relief, concern, frustration. He opens his mouth to speak, then a look of consternation overtakes his expression. He closes it, then tries again. “Please?” he asks, the sweetness of his tone belied by the half annoyed, half hopeful look on his face.

“Good boy,” Aaron tells him, pressing close again. Alex breathes deeply against his neck. Aaron rubs a hand up Alex’s spine, toying with sensitive spots with his thumb as he passes them.

“Now,” he reaches a hand between them, unfastening Alex’s underwear and letting it fall, “Let’s finish getting you undressed.”

He kneels to help Alex step out of his underwear, then turns his full attention to gently, carefully removing Alex’s stockings, firmly stroking the exposed flesh as he pulls down the black fabric.

Alex’s, “Please,” is possibly the most frustrated the word has ever sounded.

Aaron isn’t toying with his sub to be mean- on the contrary, he wants every part of Alex sensitive and hopeful for his touch before he ties him up. Alex is getting there, now. Aaron trails his hands back up to his sub’s hips, steadying himself as he stands.

“Lie down on the bed on your back, arms out,” he instructs.

Now that the room and Alex are ready, they can finally begin.

 

Chapter 8: Chapter 8: A Scene

Summary:

Now that Aaron has everything ready, they can begin.

Notes:

This is the scene we set up in the last chapter. If the more sexual side of their relationship isn't what you're after, skip this one and know next chapter will be more your speed!

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

“Lie down on the bed on your back, arms out,” he instructs.

Alex obeys with alacrity, throwing himself into the bed and looking at his Dom hopefully.

Aaron climbs onto the mattress after his sub, straddling Alex with his knees bracketing the other man’s waist. “I get to have my fun tonight,” he tells his sub. “I get to taste and touch you any way I want, and you’re just going to lie here and take it for me, aren’t you?” he asks.

Alex’s, “Please,” is emphatic. The sub is beyond ready to begin.

Aaron picks up the first cuff, showing Alex. “This buckles around your wrist. It’s clipped to the chain, and the clip opens when you press it. So it shouldn’t come undone by mistake, but I can get you out quickly if you safeword. I won’t worry about the buckles, I’ll unhook you from the chain.”

Alex nods in understanding. The clips are fairly standard, flattened metal bent into an oval, one end overlapping the other and holding it in place. The metal is flexible enough to be bent back, to slide the link of a chain in or out. It’s far harder to bend out, so there’s very little worry about the clips accidentally releasing.

One of the things that had drawn Aaron to this set, over other options, had been how quickly he can get Alex out of them. If Alex panics, or the housekeeper comes up to announce the arrival of a guest and throws Alex out of subspace, or anything goes wrong, Alex can be free in an instant. Of course, Alex can also operate the clip in an emergency- Aaron has made sure that, lying on his back, he’ll be able to reach his own cuffs.

“Ready?” Aaron asks.

“Please,” Alex tells him eagerly, offering his wrists. He’s doing an excellent job with remembering his words- it would be easy, with Aaron asking him questions, to answer them naturally instead of following the rule. Aaron is pleased to see the obedience- he just wonders if it will carry over when Alex gets worked up.

He gets Alex fastened in and watches as his sub tests the restraints, curious. They move with him, to a certain extent- the headboard has heavy spindles, and Aaron threaded the chain through several, but he also left some slack for Alex to turn over. So he has some freedom of movement now.

As Alex considers this, Aaron gets up from the bed. Alex makes a startled squawk as he steps away, but remembers not to verbalize the question. Aaron rewards him by telling him what he knows his sub is wondering. “I’m just getting undressed. I’ll be right back.”

Alex tugs against the restraints. “Please,” he says, frustrated. He obviously doesn’t like Aaron not focusing on him, when he’s all tied up at the other man’s mercy.

“Patience, Alex,” Aaron assures him. “Besides, are you sure you want me back so soon? You don’t know what I have planned.”

This, “Please,” is flatly disbelieving, as if Alex were saying, ‘Please be serious.’ Aaron hadn’t anticipated just how much his beautiful sub would be able to convey, limited to one word begging.

He’s extremely entertained. “Okay, yes, you’re going to like what I’ve got planned,” he admits, chuckling, as he quickly finishes shucking his clothes. He’s built enough anticipation. He’s ready to get started.

“Now,” he tells Alex, “I believe I mentioned wanting to taste you. I’d like to be able to kiss and lick you all over, but you’re never still enough for me to try. Today, I can take my time.”

And he does. He finds a spot above Alex’s inner elbow that makes him go, “Pleasepleaseplease,” like a prayer. And a spot along his side that makes him beg, “Please!” through huffs of laughter. He works in a corkscrew pattern, getting gradually closer to where he knows Alex wants him. First his arms, then an unexpectedly sensitive spot on his inner ankle. Then his sub’s navel and inner thigh. Sometimes just licking, sometimes kissing, other times biting and sucking at sensitive spots.

Finally, he licks Alex’s balls, and the other man says, “Please,” in a voice that sounds more like, ‘Finally!’

Aaron grins devilishly, sitting up to see Alex. “Oh, you’d prefer I stick to erogenous zones for a while?” he asks.

“Please.” Alex nods emphatically.

Aaron smiles at him and leans down- to tease a nipple with his tongue. Alex groans in frustration, letting his head fall back. “Please,” he wines.

Alex’s nipples aren’t particularly sensitive. His cock is though, and every time Aaron brushes against it as he leans over Alex, it jumps eagerly. His sub is ready to explode with sexual frustration.

“Oh, was this not what you wanted?” Aaron asks, releasing Alex’s nipple. Alex glares at him. “Well, tough. This is for me, not you.” He continues his attention to Alex’s chest.

Alex pounds the bed in frustration, growling wordlessly at him.

“Hey, none of that,” Aaron says sternly, sitting up and holding out a hand for the offending arm. Alex looks wide eyed and worried as he offers it. “I expect respectful behavior from you during any scene, regardless of the rules of the specific encounter. Being overwhelmed and losing yourself in the moment is fine. Acting out in a fit of temper when you don’t get your way isn’t,” he scolds. He gives Alex a single smack on his inner forearm, just above the cuff.

The swat barely hurt, he knows. The scolding was the reproof- the smack was just… punctuation. Still, Alex looks stricken. He knows Aaron isn’t teasing, and that his Dom is genuinely disappointed.

Alex opens his mouth to say something, then closes it, stymied. He doesn’t want to disobey, but he’s obviously upset to have earned a genuine reproof, not just correction, during the scene. “You may say what you need to, just this once,” Aaron allows, not wanting Alex to stew.

“I’m sorry,” his sub tells him immediately, leaning towards him only to be caught by the cuffs. He glares at them, frustrated.

Aaron crosses the small distance between them instead, pulling Alex into a hug. “You’re forgiven. I know you’re used to letting your temper out at whoever is annoying you, but I show you more respect than that, and I think I deserve the same from you.” Alex nods into his shoulder.

“It may be a tough habit to unlearn,” Aaron allows, “but we’ll work on it. Together. Now, I’m not mad, and you’re forgiven,” he assures his sub, pulling back enough to kiss him gently. “Do you need to stop, or want to keep going?” he asks.

Alex is still new to being answerable to a Dom for his behavior, and sometimes it throws him off. Now, though, he smiles at Aaron, leaning back against the pillow. “Please?” he asks, making his choice clear.

Aaron smiles back. “Hmm, now where was I?” he wonders aloud. “Oh, I remember. Teasing- I mean tasting- your nipples.” He winks at Alex, letting him see that he’s playing, that they’re okay and the scene can continue.

Alex’s arousal had flagged some when he was upset, so Aaron doesn’t spend long on his other nipple before working his way back down. He licks and nips at his sub’s balls, playing with them, but leaves his actual cock- which is once more very interested in the proceedings- untouched.

Alex whines, shifting his hips. “Please!” he groans.

Aaron’s head pops up. “What?” You want me to touch your cock? You want me to lick it and swallow you down?”

Alex groans.

“Well, if you want me to pay attention to your cock before I flip you over and start on your back, you’d better beg very prettily, and see if I’m inclined to give you what you want,” he suggests. “Who knows- I have enough planned still, I might let you come before I flip you over, if you’re very good for me.”

Alex begs beautifully. He makes an entire language out of the word please, begging shamelessly for his Dom’s lips on his cock. When he gets what he wants, he keeps begging, the word, ‘Please,’ falling from his lips over and over again in desperation until at last he shouts it out as he comes.

Aaron swallows him down, then climbs up the bed to kiss his sub until he’s sensible again. He’s ready to flip Alex over, and he doesn’t want to do that until the sub is aware of him.

Eventually, Alex tilts his head to capture Aaron’s next kiss with his lips. He kisses hot and hungrily, and Aaron lets him show his gratitude that way before leaning back.

“Roll over for me, sweetheart,” he says. Alex does, crossing the chain as he does. He’s surprised to realize he can now barely move his arms at all. He tests it, tugging them, and finds himself held firm.

Aaron smiles from where he’s sitting beside him. “You can’t move anymore, can you?” he asks. Alex nods. “That was the plan. Of course, I can still unhook them. But until I do, you’re completely at my mercy,” he says, smiling. Alex shivers in anticipation.

“You know one of the advantages of letting you come?” Aaron asks, waiting to see if Alex will take the bait. His sub remembers the rules, and stays quiet. “You’re extra sensitive, afterwards,” he says, running a hand up Alex’s thigh and squeezing his nearest cheek.

“I was almost hoping you’d forget yourself and say something you shouldn’t have as you came, so I had an excuse to spank you like this. Tied up, sensitive, and at my mercy.” Alex shudders.

“Please,” the sub says quietly.

“You know, I think you’d like that. And so would I. And since I make the rules around here…” He gives Alex a quick, light spank.

“Please!” his sub says, sounding surprised.

“Does that feel good? Sharp? Hot?” He keeps spanking as he asks, not letting up. “It stings and burns, but you love it. You’ll come undone all over again, just from me spanking your pretty bottom, won’t you?” he asks.

“Please!” Alex cries. Then, softer but no less needy, “Pleeease.”

“Very well. I do like to start on a pretty canvas, and you’re even more beautiful than usual with a little pink on you,” Aaron tells him.

He spanks his sub lightly, letting his fingers add the sting and building a pretty, rosy color across his cheeks. Alex quickly loses control of himself, arching up into the spanks.

He spanks Alex to a very pretty pink indeed, the color warm and soft against his tanned skin. Each cheek is rosy, with a stripe down his cleft remaining pale. Aaron decides that won’t do, and grips Alex’s nearest cheek, pulling it back to expose that protected flesh.

Alex howls at the first spank there. The skin is so sensitive- even a little swat has obviously affected him. Alex clearly can’t decide if he likes it or not. “Hold still,” Aaron scolds. “I want uninterrupted pink. These pretty cheeks are mine to play with.” He spanks the area again, making Alex’s legs tense.

“Please,” Alex begs, and his body finally decides what to do and raises his hips, pushing back toward Burr. He takes the invitation, spanking his sub’s cleft until Alex really is pink all over.

The sub obviously enjoys it, and he whines when Aaron stops. He pats his sub’s rosy backside, getting to his feet. “Don’t worry, now that you’re warmed up,I thought we’d get out the toys,” he tells Alex, retrieving the flogger.

“Please!” Alex says eagerly, pulling his knees under him to present his backside.

“Very pretty,” Aaron tells his sub. “Now, the thing I like about this flogger, is that I can use it on your bottom, of course.” He gives his sub a few spanks, watching how he jerks with each, fighting to limit himself to the litany of, ‘Please,’ spilling from his lips.

“But I can also use it elsewhere,” he tells Alex, striking his shoulder. Alex groans, and Aaron continues, warming his shoulders.

Alex takes the flogger beautifully. Even though he’s only just come, his body is obviously ready to go again from the feel of it, if the way he arches up with a constant litany of pleading is any indication.

When Alex is on the verge of coming again, Aaron backs off, lightening the strokes before finally leaving off. “Time to get you ready for me,” he says, kneeling down and opening Alex up with his tongue.

This time, when his sub punches the bed, it’s not temper, it’s overload. “Please, please,” he begs, as Aaron works him open, his hands playing with Alex’s balls as he works.

Finally, he sits up. “Roll over for me,” he instructs, tapping Alex so he’ll roll in the direction that will tighten the chain further, not uncross it. Alex does. He’s now completely trapped and at his Dom’s mercy.Aaron arranges his legs for the best possible angle, pulling one over his shoulder. Alex looks up at him, pupils blown and needy.

Aaron reaches for the oil he’d sat to the side earlier, slicking up himself and Alex, then he picks the flogger back up. “The great thing about this,” he says conversationally as Alex babbles pleas and he slides himself into his sub, “is that I can use it all kinds of places. I think I’m ready to experiment.”

He seats himself, then lands a smack of the flogger across Alex’s left nipple. His sub arches up off the bed. Aaron allows himself one stroke, bottoming out again and repeating the strike on the right nipple. Alex keens.

“You like that?” Aaron asks.

“Please,” Alex says, desperately.

He alternates strokes and smacks as long as he can, before finally letting the flogger fall so he can brace himself with his hands on either side of Alex and really thrust into him. Alex comes apart in his arms, screaming, “Please!” as he comes.

Aaron follows him soon after, the feel of Alex’s orgasm drawing his own from him. He collapses onto his sub, taking a moment to catch his breath.

Then, he rolls off of Alex, kissing him softly before tenderly unhooking the cuffs. He unfastens the buckles on them, pleased that he was right- the thick, padded leather hasn’t left bruises, even when Alex lost himself completely. Alex tries to bury his face in Burr’s stomach, but he pushes him back. “Not yet,” he says softly, stroking Alex’s hair.

He gets up, wetting a cloth from the basin and warming it against his skin before cleaning them up. He puts the crop and the cuffs aside, then returns to bed to hold Alex, who curls against him quietly.

“You know you can talk now, right?” Aaron checks.

Alex nods dreamily.

“Good,” Aaron tells him, kissing his forehead. “You’re flying high, aren’t you?” he asks.

Alex nods again.

“Alright, no sense from you for a while. Let’s just have a snuggle,” Aaron decides, sliding down the bed to hold his sub, who immediately octopuses onto him.

Aaron rubs Alex’s back until his sub gradually seems to come back to himself. “Hey,” he whispers.

“Hey,” Alex replies- the first word he’s said besides, ‘Please,’ in what feels like hours.

“You were incredible,” Aaron tells his sub. “So amazing and perfect.”

“That was… wow,” Alex tells him softly.

“Anything you didn’t like?” Aaron checks.

Alex scrunches his face up. “Messing up. But that’s mine to fix, not yours,” Alex admits.

“You were able to move on from it, though. That’s good. It was a blip, it didn’t ruin the scene,” Aaron praises him.

“I was glad you let me apologize,” Alex admits. “I couldn’t have let it go, otherwise.”

“I thought so. You handled it well,” Aaron assures his sub. “Now, anything you did like?” he asks.

Alex grins at him. “Everything? Especially not being able to move. And.. only being able to say please was like a more intense version of not looking while you got ready. Like, without the pressure to analyze what you were doing, or come up with something to say, I could just be,” he admits.

“That’s wonderful. I’ll remember that,” Aaron promises.

“I like the cuffs. And the flogger,” Alex reports sleepily.

“Good. I do, too. Do you need a nap?” Aaron asks.

Alex nods. “Stay?” he asks.

“Of course,” Aaron says, settling in to hold his sub as long as he wants. He’ll make sure Alex gets something to eat later- though he may go down for something and feed Alex by hand, here in bed. His sub had gone down deep, and it’s taking him some time to come back up. Aaron is happy to let him linger as long as he wants.

 

Notes:

As always, PLEASE let me know what you think! I think I partially write for the sake of connecting with others, through storytelling!

Chapter 9: Chapter 9: Communication

Summary:

Alex wakes up, comes back up, and writes some letters, to people who may be important later and one person who has always been important to him.

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Alex wakes up like trying to sit up in a pool of molasses. He feels pulled down, like getting up and making decisions is just too much work. So he leans against Aaron’s chest, instead.

Aaron smiles down at him. “Awake, sweetheart?” he asks.

Alex nods, not feeling the need to add anything more. Or do anything but lie here, safe in his Dom’s arms. If Aaron wants something else, he’ll say so.

His Dom does just snuggle him for a few minutes, before saying, “I’d like for you to eat something.” Alex nods agreeably. He is, he realizes dimly, absolutely ravenous. He’d been too nervous about telling Herc to eat, earlier in the day.

“Will you be okay if I go get us something to nibble on?” Aaron asks. Alex shrugs. He’s okay with whatever his Dom decides.

Aaron frowns for a second, but it’s a thinking frown, not a displeased one, Alex decides. “I’m going to go get us something to nibble on. Call for me if you need me,” his Dom tells him, getting up.

Alex stretches into the warmth he’s left behind, content to wait.

When his Dom returns, Alex moves eagerly aside to make room for him again. Aaron, adorably, has gotten fully dressed to go down to the kitchen, instead of just pulling on a dressing gown. Alex loves how proper his Dom is. He kisses him, so Burr knows.

Aaron kisses him back, cradling him against his chest. Alex burrows happily into him. Aaron feeds him bites of bread and cheese with his hands, and Alex nuzzles him affectionately, kissing his fingers so Aaron knows he appreciates the gentle care. He drinks the wine Burr offers him as well, when it’s offered, but he’s content to wait for whatever his Dom puts to his lips next.

When Burr decides they’ve had enough, he shifts to put the plate and glass aside, pushing himself (and Alex, who is pressed against him) to sit a little more upright. “You ready to get up  yet?” he asks.

Alex smiles at him, dimly aware that he’s been asked a question but too floaty to particularly care what option Aaron decides on. He’ll get up if his Dom wants them to.

“I’ve got to start timing scenes better,” Aaron says, sounding amused. “Alex, sweetheart, I’ve done way too much ‘not packing’ lately. I really need to get some packing done. Let’s get up, okay?”

Alex sits up along with his Dom, vaguely aware that he should probably start actively participating in what’s going on around him. “You want me to help?” he offers, slowly.

“No, you said you had correspondence to take care of, this afternoon. I don’t want to keep you from your work,” Aaron assures him. That thought, finally, sticks.

Correspondence. Letters.  Like the one he owes Lafayette. The one he hasn’t sent, because he didn’t want to write without sharing his news. Because he’d been too nervous to share it. Alex shakes his head, coming the rest of the way back to himself.

“Right. I do have work to do.” He gets up, searching around the room for his clothes and redressing. Aaron, naturally, has laid them out neatly for him. He kisses his Dom appreciatively. “I quite enjoy your timing, actually,” he says, smiling mischievously and retreating to Aaron’s office, which he’s developed a tendency to commandeer.

He’s got a folio he’s taken to carrying back and forth between addresses, with current correspondence. He opens it up, sneering at the top item.

He’s not sure what Jefferson was thinking, inviting him to the Inauguration Ball. It’s convenient, now that they’ve decided to go to the ceremony, but the invitation is almost an offense. Alex can’t help wondering if Jefferson thinks he’s sold out and will now suck up to him like everyone else, or if this is another Jeffersonian power play- ‘You can sit in the audience, but it’s my show.’

Regardless, he puts the invitation to the side, since it will serve as he and Eliza’s entry to the ceremony, and works to put Jefferson out of his mind.

The next letter is a polite, ‘How have you been?’ from a banker he’d known, who is clearly wondering how well connected he still is within the party. He gets these occasionally: old acquaintances, hoping for political favors and thinking he’s still got the sway to make things happen. Will Marbury writes that he’s been recently ‘enlightened as to his duty and, as such, has developed a willingness to become some sort of civil servant, such as a judge or justice’.

Will is a small minded idiot- fantastic with numbers and a sly banker, but absolutely not someone Alex would have lobbied for even at a time when he had the authority to lobby anyone. His contentious relationship with Adams is known to the inner circle of the party, but hangers on who’ve missed the soon to be former President’s outright racism assume them to be compatriots. Alex is almost tempted to write Adams on Marbury’s behalf, if only because the letter is bound to arrive too late for any appointment and be considered a mark against the man, besides.

He’ll do it, he decides, because it will amuse him to waste Adams’ time and get Marbury’s hopes up. First, he writes Adams:

Dear President Adams,

I know I have been absent DC and the political scene for some time, though I hope you know my mind has never been far from our country’s future successes and your work. I write you now with that very thought in mind: Of late, an old acquaintance, a William Marbury, has had cause to come into my mind and I have been delighted to discover his civic minded interest in giving back by serving some sort of appointment, if one should become available for him. He is an avid Federalist and is sly with numbers- you know what advantage that would be in a judge.

I do wish Abigail the best, as well as yourself, and hope that this letter finds you well.

Sincerely,

Alexander Hamilton

The letter is full of snide remarks, such as the ‘advantage’ being good with numbers would serve a judge, who needs to understand words, or wishing Abigail the best ‘as well as her husband’- if she’s gotten stuck with John, Alex rather thinks she deserves the best in everything else. It’s a wholly futile piece of writing and in infantile waste of his time, but it amuses him, so he seals it up to be sent to DC.

He writes Marbury next.

Dear Mr. Marbury,

I hope this letter finds you in good health! You cannot imagine my delight upon reading your letter, and I have immediately passed on my thoughts as to your suitability to a man I regard as highly as I do yourself, Mr. President Adams. I fear the twilight of his service is upon us, but I may hope that my letter will reach him in good time and you will be rewarded with exactly the sort of place in our nation’s workings which you deserve.

Your Obedient Servant,

Alexander Hamilton

This one makes him chuckle out loud to himself. He does, indeed, hold Marbury and Adams in similar regard- and only someone who knows what he thinks of Adams would know that for the insult it is. As far Marbury getting what he deserves, Alex does hope that- which is why he’s sending off the letter far too late to do anyone any good.

He finishes sealing it, then turns to the last two letters he needs to respond to- and the response he’s written but not yet dared to send.

He rereads the older letter first.

Mon petit lion,

I hope this letter finds you well, mon ami. I understand that your elections are over, and my old friend Thomas has won the Presidency. He tells me it is in account of your unexpected support. I am only glad to see Adams trounced so thoroughly- he deserves it several times over, in addition to what he should suffer for his vile behavior towards you after all you have accomplished for America alongside notre général.

I do hope this marks a softening of you and Thomas’ animosity toward one another- I dearly believe, given the chance, you would become great friends. I will not réprimander about your previous treatment of one another, I only counsel that this might be a time for a new beginning.

Adrienne and  I have been gladly reunited since I wrote you last, Napoleon having pardoned us as he promised. It is a strange thing, to fight for revolution and change only to see yourself declared that which needs be thrown out with the old. I am pleased to be in my beloved France once more, no longer considered an enemy of the state.

Perhaps, in time, my home will reach such stability that I will feel free to travel the ocean once more and embrace you and Hercules. Before, I feared venturing too far from my country when she might have need of me. Now, I am too grateful for my tentative return to my homeland to risk it by departing. Adrienne and I have discussed it, and she would much like to meet you and Hercules, but especially you. Thomas offers us a place at Monticello if we ever visit at least once a year, and I like to imagine that when we were further North we might impinge on your hospitality in New York and so relive our glory days.

We were wild things then, were we not? Invincible in our brotherhood, determined to live far beyond the confines of our ordinary human lives and bodies. I shall always remember you as larger than life, for all you were the smallest of us. I long to see the man you have grown into, and take you in my arms once more. Hercules teases me by drawing both of your likenesses, when he writes. But I confess I see the mischief in your eyes in his drawings and you do not look a day aged to me. I know time must have aged you, as it has me- though I often forget it in myself until I gaze upon a mirror. It aches to feel I no longer know the faces of those I hold most dear. Even Adrienne was a surprise to me after my exile, though mercifully my wife only grows more beautiful with each passing month.

As always, I remain yours in heart and oath,

Gilbert du Motier, Marquis de Lafayette

Alex feels guilty as he rereads the letter, the hope and fondness in Laf’s words coming clearly through the page. Especially when he pics up the next one.

Mon coeur,

I fear you have spoiled me, with regular correspondence. I expect to hear from you within every month, and yet it has been over two.  I can only assume then that the contents of my last letter have offended you.

I know it was not my desire to see you, as that is a dearly held wish you have long shared. I can assume only that it is my comments on recent politics and that old friend of mine which has long been your enemy.

Hear me, Alexander, mon petit lion: None in your country could ever be so dear to my heart as are you and our Hercules. Thomas was a friend of adventure and experimentation, but he is not the brother of my heart as you are. If there is some fresh trouble between you which I have not heard, I did not mean to undermine it or take his side.  Indeed, though I have often counseled you both toward truce, know that, were the choice ever made necessary, I would not even consider before choosing you.

I know I tend to be the fretting older brother when I speak to your conflict with Thomas. Know he receives the same admonishments I find myself incapable of silencing when I write to you. And if I have overstepped, know that it was done with nothing more than sincere love for you.

I hope you can forgive my trespass, and write to me so that I may know of you and yours. How is the newspaper? How are Eliza and Maria? I know Phillip’s birthday approaches, and I hope the date does not trouble you overmuch. Adrienne and I shall light a candle for him on that day, and he will be in our hearts for his place in yours.

Adrienne says I should perhaps not write that, as I try to make amends. But I cannot help worrying over you, mon coeur, while you are not only so far away but so remote from me in words as well.

Please write back, even if it is in anger, so that I may know that you are well.

Humbly and with great love,

Your Laf

Alex is the worst kind of scum for worrying Laf the way he has. He should’ve, if nothing else, shot his old friend a short note when he’d received this sorrowful letter, but he’d been frozen in indecision.

He couldn’t write Lafayette, of all people, and not tell him about Burr. But he couldn’t bring himself to send those words, in black and white, across the ocean to be opened and read, by someone who truly sees him for who he is. So he’d put off answering. Phillip’s birthday has come and passed, now. It was a hard day, without his beloved son. Knowing Phillip is not forgotten, either at home or among friends, had eased the pain somewhat.

Alex begins a new letter, horribly aware of how badly he’s treated his friend.

Dearest Laf,

You have not offended me. Indeed, it is I who must beg your pardon for my failure to reply. I had something which was at once too large not to share with you and too frighteningly important to commit to paper. Not knowing what to do, I took the coward’s way out and did not write you at all.

You are right, that it had something to do with Jefferson’s win of the presidency, but it was not your mention of him that silenced me months ago. I spoke out against Burr and in favor of Jefferson more to spite the one than to help the other, and heaven help me, Burr finally reached the limit of his patience with my tongue.

You remember the night we all met? Well, a part of me belonged to him from that night onward. I suspect it is why I could not find anyone else who even remotely filled John’s place in my life. John knew how I wanted to submit, and respected why I could not fully do so. I could never find that again, and all else I could want was the man I could submit to.

Aaron.

It looks so strange, writing his first name to you. We’ve always called him Burr. He was John’s ex, then. Maybe at times my friend, though I was wary of admitting it. He’s so much more, now.

He’s the love of my life, Gil.

I shouldn’t say it, or I shouldn’t hesitate over it. I can’t tell which, anymore. I took him to see Herc, for a suit for his inauguration as Vice President. Herc sees that I’m happy, and it’s enough. I hope you can feel the same way. Please, don’t blame him for my shameless rudeness these past months- he had no idea I was neglecting you. He would never dream of demanding control over my correspondence, though he’d scold me thoroughly for rudeness if he knew how I’ve behaved.

Indeed, we saw Herc only earlier today and told him. Herc didn’t scold, but he told me you were worried enough that you’d mentioned missing me to him. Gil, I feel terrible. You’re one of the most important people in the world to me. This wasn’t one of my dark periods where I get lost in my work and look up for no one and nothing else, I’ve been keeping atop my correspondence, except yours.

It’s because your good opinion matters to me so much that I couldn’t write you, Laf. Even now, I shake with fear that you’ll be disgusted with me, submitting to Aaron like this. I know I deserve your censure for my inexcusable rudeness in failing to write to you, but Laf, please don’t disapprove of me finally admitting who I am, now. This is who I always was, I was just too afraid to confess it, before.

Yours, penitent and regretful,

Alexander Hamilton

He seals that one as well, before he can change his mind. He darts out into the hallway, checking the clock, then yells, “Aaron, I’m going to try to make it to the post office!”

He doesn’t much care when Marbury and Adams get his letter, but he’ll be damned if he gives himself time to chicken out and remain silent to Gil another night. Aaron yells something vaguely affirmative from upstairs, and Alex is off to the post office, forgetting his coat and hat.

He makes it just in time, and he breathes a little easier, seeing his letter to Lafayette sorted to be sent overseas. It’s weighed on him, not responding to his friend, but he hasn’t been able to find the courage to do it. Then, every day he didn’t do it, his worry about how angry Lafayette would be about his failure to write grew, and he’d worked himself up so thoroughly he’d frozen completely.

The realization that Maria and Aaron needed formal wear is probably the only thing that got him to speak to either of his two oldest friends again this year, as worried as he’s been about their reactions. He’d been able to convince himself it wouldn’t be as big of a deal, just bringing Aaron to his tailor. Who happens to be one of his closest and oldest friends.

He hadn’t honestly intended to leave Aaron and Maria to meet Herc alone and explain. How unfair it was to his Dom to spring Herc on him and vise versa aside, there was a decent chance of Herc getting upset and, while he’d absolutely never hurt anyone without a genuinely good reason, Alex never would’ve risked Maria feeling trapped between two angry Dominants intentionally.

He’d spent the whole morning telling himself it was time to leave. Then, ‘arriving early enough to explain things to Herc before Aaron arrives’ turned into ‘meeting Aaron and Maria there’, which became, ‘they’ve probably just walked in, I shouldn’t interrupt, Aaron’s more diplomatic than me, I might make things worse’ and finally turned into ‘arriving after the dust settled.’

It was cowardly, it was rude, and it was beneath him. But he’d panicked, just like he did with writing to Laf.  It’s ridiculous- however closely he’s guarded the secret of his orientation over the past almost 25 years, Herc and Laf were always on the inside of the secret. They know. Though when they’d all tumbled into bed together, back then, he’d rarely been openly submissive.

It’s more about the inevitability of discovery. Every tiny bit he loosens his grip on hiding his truth, he comes that much closer to the day it all spills out in gossip or the papers, whether he wants it to or not. He could’ve been observed coming and going from Herc’s with Aaron. Questions could be asked.

Or Adams’ damnedable Alien and Sedition Acts could be used to justify reading his letter to Laf. He shudders at the thought of some ‘intelligence officer’ pawing through his letter, flagging it because he and Laf are former Revolutionaries, and passing it up the chain of command. It was a risk.

Everything feels like a risk, these days. Any moment he’s out of the house, he worries what he’s giving away. Can someone on the street tell he was in subspace earlier? Does he walk differently, when he’s beside Aaron? Will he flinch when his clothes drag across marks, alerting someone to what the fabric is hiding?

Still, he took those first steps today, telling Herc and writing Laf. And he’s agreed to go to DC with Aaron. He knows his Dom is pleased, and the unfamiliar, so-long-dormant-he-barely-recognizes-it, happy submissive in him is satisfied with that. That tiny voice says, ‘If Aaron’s happy with you, who cares what everyone else thinks?’

Alex does. Quite distinctly. He’s a submissive, yes, but he’s also a statesman. But today, he’s going to try to stop worrying and be proud of how far they’ve come. Whatever tomorrow holds, he’ll face it, holding Aaron’s hand. That’ll be enough.

Notes:

There we go! I'm excited to get back into Alex's head. I didn't realize how long it's been.

Also, I'm having health issues (chronic, not COVID) and feeling crummy/ not even up for my usual Zoom socialization. I haven't really gotten the hang of using tumblr yet, but if you feel like coming by and saying hi, I'm @anotherfngrl.

As always, reviews make me happy and you guys have NO idea how much impact your thoughts have, as far as giving me new ideas! I'd love to hear from you.

Chapter 10: Chapter 10: Hercules

Summary:

Hercules gets to work, stops by Mulligan's, and gets a new client.

Notes:

HERCULES MULLIGAN! A tailor.... No longer spying on the British government, now MAKING AWESOME CLOTHES.
I love Hercules. Like, a lot. I adore him. Someone else some of you probably adore turns up briefly here, too.

Also, I got very attached to writing Herc and wound up writing him witnessing (sort of) Aaron punishing Alex and his thoughts on that and their dynamic. It doesn't fit in this fic, if just stretches the Herc section out too much. Is there any interest if I turn it into a one shot?

Chapter Text

Hercules has cleared the next few days in his schedule, so when Alex and his people leave, he immediately gets to work. He’s alone in the shop, having sent his assistant to help at Mulligan’s, to make up for how little he’ll be there in the coming days.

Maintaining two shops is an indulgence. Mulligan’s could more than support his family, and if he marketed HM at all, it would also keep him busy enough to go on. But he likes being choosy.

He’d started Mulligan’s first, taking any order that came in. The other patriots hadn’t forgotten him and what he’d done for their cause, and after the British left he’d opened his own shop and found himself thoroughly busy dressing fellow Sons of Liberty.

Business had grown by word of mouth, and soon he’d had a large, visible storefront and people he didn’t know were coming to see him. He’d hired help, then more help, then found himself so mired in basics- the sensible navy wool and the like that Burr favors- that he’d been ready to scream.

He’d sat down with Lizzy and talked over his options, but no solution presented itself. He’d only enjoyed himself anymore when he was sewing for Alex. Alex had taken to life as a gentleman, and he’d bring Hercules ideas for fashionable suits and they’d sketch them up so Herc could make them reality. Laf would send him sketches of the current fashion wherever he was, and Alex always wanted to try it.

He started working on the standard daywear less, leaving that to his employees, and telling people who came in looking for something a little more unique that he was happy to consult on design work. Eventually, he had too many in progress projects for gentlemen and ladies who wanted a little flair to fit into the corner he’d reserved for his own work in the shop, and foot traffic continued to make Mulligan’s grow.

The choice to open a second storefront had been terrifying. What if no one came? But he’d kept it exclusive, by appointment, and relied on word of mouth. At first, he was at Mulligans as many days as he was at HM, but slowly he’d been able to leave the other shop in the competent hands of his lead tailor and focus on his custom work exclusively, aside from the odd drop in to check on things and lend a hand.

It’s nice, getting to pick and choose what he does. If someone wants something particularly traditional, he usually sends them to Mulligan’s. Sometimes with notes about changes to standard patterns or extra embellishments.

If anybody but Alexander Hamilton had walked in wanting such a boring suit as the one he’s making Burr, he’d have sent them over for the others to worry about. But for Alex, he’ll sew a boring, navy suit. Though he fully intends to make the liner something patterned heavily with burgundy, to break up the navy and tie in the vest. Burr will have to deal with it.

He’s more looking forward to Maria’s dress. She’d looked through the sketches he’d done with Eliza in mind and found one she quite liked, and he’s working it up in a soft, sheer red silk over a pure, lovely white. When she stands next to Burr, they’ll look like the Fourth of July.

He’s going to need to borrow one of the seamstresses from Mulligan’s, to get everything done. He’s got a couple of other Inauguration Ball commissions still in process, though he’s been working hard on them since Alex made his appointment, knowing his friend was going to throw off whatever plans he’d made. But for Alex, he’d done it.

He spoils Alex shamelessly. They all did, back then. He dreams so big for the country and expects so little personally that you can’t help wanting to surprise him, or indulge his whims. Alex is no less a whirlwind now than he’d been at twenty, full of the first wind of freedom and the promise of something more.

Hercules makes a list of fabrics he needs from Mulligan’s, where he keeps most of his stock. Their storerooms are larger. He’ll bring his supplies over today and get as much cut as he can. He’ll also arrange to borrow a seamstress for tomorrow to work on Burr’s basics while he drapes Maria’s dress. Then he can work on Burr’s jacket himself while his seamstress hems the miles of fabric that will go into Maria’s dress.

Plan made, Hercules heads over to Mulligan’s.

“Why is this so difficult?” A customer demands as he walks in. The woman with him shushes him.

“No, Dolley. First, my usual tailor won’t do it. Then, I walk into the first tailor on the street, a shop that purports to meet a gentleman’s every need, and they act like I’m speaking French!” the man insists. “It’s beyond ridiculous.”

“What seems to be the problem?” Hercules asks, trying to be heard over the man’s continued complaints to his obviously stressed shop girl. It's Emily, his own assistant, and he smiles at her knowingly as he tries to distract her problem customer. The woman hears him, leaving her companion arguing with Emily as she turns to him, exasperated.

“He’s determined to have a pink cravat to go with his suit. For evening wear, you understand. His tailor says it’s just not done, but he’s absolutely adamant. He had the suit made back home, but James wasn’t feeling well so he escorted me up here for my dress, and he’s got far too much to do to be pouring so much effort into this silly neckwear. And your poor girl has never heard of such a thing, though she’s very sweet and trying to help. It’s only an accessory. If I had the faintest idea what fabric would be best, I’d make it myself,” she says, looking upset. “The place he used to go when we all spent more time up here turned him down outright, so he’s in high dudgeon and I don’t know how I’ll calm him.”

The verbal deluge makes it clear that, only an accessory or not, she’s as stressed by her companion’s insistence as her companion is over his cravat. And poor Emily is looking more harried by the minute. If he doesn't want his assistant deciding enough is enough and booting them, he needs to do something.

Hercules can’t resist a woman in distress. It’s only a cravat- he can knock that out this evening, or tomorrow. It will hardly take any time at all. “I’ll make it,” he promises.

“You will?” The pretty woman who’s just poured out her tale of secondhand sartorial woe looks like he’s promised her the moon. “I’m sorry, who are you?” she asks, realizing belatedly that they’d skipped introductions.

“The owner of the shop, ma’am. I’d just come in for some supplies I need sent back to my other shop, where I do custom work. If your…” he hesitates, not knowing who the other man is to her- her verbal deluge had implied ‘James’ was her husband, so this man could be anyone to her.

“I never quite know how to describe what he is to me. He’s my husband’s best friend,” she explains.

“Well, if your husband’s best friend will bring his suit to my other shop, we’ll select a cut and a suitable material and I’ll get it made,” Hercules promises.

“I do hate to ask, when you’re being so accommodating, but how long will it take? We’re in quite a bit of a hurry, with the Inauguration Ball coming up,” she confides.

“I just took measurements for two commissions for the very same event. Don’t fret, you’ll be in good company. Some of the most important people there will be wearing my work,” Hercules assures her with a wink.

The gentleman with her seems to have finally realized she’s left him, and tuned in enough to hear that she’s solved his problem. Emily, the much beleaguered shop girl, looks thoroughly relieved when he turns to face them. “If you make my cravat, the most important man in the room will be wearing your work,” he says imperiously, turning around with a flourish.

And that’s when Hercules realizes that, resplendent with good intentions, he’s just agreed to sew for Thomas Jefferson. He curses himself as the realization sets in.

“President Jefferson! How wonderful to make your acquaintance,” he says. Dolley must be Dolley Madison, then- James is her husband, the other half of the pair that had been such a thorn in Alex’s side in his cabinet days.

Jefferson sniffs. “I’d intended to leave tomorrow morning. I hadn’t anticipated such a simple errand taking so long. I’m needed back at Monticello, to make the final preparations for the move to the Presidential Mansion.”

Hercules wonders if this man has ever lived somewhere that wasn’t capitalized.

“Well, I’ll need to see the suit and pick a fabric, but how about I send it along with your Vice President?” he offers, thinking quickly.

“You’re going to hunt Burr down and make him bring me my cravat?” Jefferson seems amused by the idea. “His first official duty as Vice President- seeing to my wardrobe!”

“I thought I’d just give it to him when he picks up his suit,” Hercules explains with a shrug. He’s surprised by the instinct to defend Burr. They’ve never been close, but the man’s relationship to Alex brings him into Hercules’ inner circle, whether either of them intended it or not. Sending the cravat with Burr will also ensure that if Alex wanders in to harass him while he’s sewing, he won’t run into Jefferson, which would almost certainly be disastrous.

“You’re Burr’s tailor, and you’re willing to do colorful neckwear?” Jefferson asks disdainfully.

“I’m not his usual, no. We have a mutual friend, who recommended me. I think you and I have a friend in common as well, whose fashion sense runs far more in line with yours than your Vice President’s does,” Hercules assures him.

“Who?” Jefferson asks, looking only mildly interested.

“Gilbert du Motier,” Hercules admits. He’s trying to steer the conversation away from Burr, and therefore away from Alex.

“The Marquis de Lafayette?” Jefferson asks, surprised.

“Laf is an old war buddy,” Herc admits.

Jefferson throws his head back and laughs. “You’re one of those from his ‘Revolutionary Set’, aren’t you? I remember there was a tailor- a spy.” Hercules nods. “Then you must know Alexander Hamilton, as well,” Jefferson muses.

“He’s an old and dear friend,” Hercules says, his tone shading toward warning.

Dolley interrupts whatever Jefferson was about to say. “Please give him my love! I’ve called on Eliza a couple of times since I’ve been in town, but that new paper of his must be keeping him awfully busy- he’s been out whenever we’ve been together.”

“I certainly will, ma’am,” Hercules tells her politely.

“Yes, pass along my regards as well.” Jefferson says it politely, but like he’s not sure he likes the taste of the words in his mouth. Dolley smiles at him encouragingly, and Hercules wonders at the relationship between them. They’re obviously closer than Jefferson being only the Dominant Madison’s friend. 

Regardless, that second message is one Hercules will not be sharing. No use getting Alex stirred up over nothing. “I’ll be sure to do that,” he says, but he can tell from Jefferson’s face that he doesn’t buy it- the way his lip quirks in amusement makes it quite clear that he knows Hercules is aware of his history with the former Treasury Secretary.

“Now that that’s taken care of, suppose we see to my cravat?” Jefferson says, thankfully moving the conversation forward. “I have my suit right here.”

“Most of my specialty fabrics are at my other shop, along with some good sketches of different cuts I can do quickly. Let me give Emily here a list of the things I came for so she can have them sent over, and I’ll take you there so we can examine our options together,” Hercules offers.

Emily takes his list gratefully, and he’s finally able to move Jefferson away from the counter and out of Mulligan’s. Luckily, his people are good. One of the tailors had taken the other woman who’d come in while they were talking aside and begun helping her while Emily was otherwise occupied. Hercules nods at him as he leads Jefferson and Dolley Madison out of the shop.

“Just this way,” he says, leading them to a less busy street and the door of HM Tailoring.

Jefferson sniffs doubtfully, looking at the simple lettering. “I find I’m quite busy enough with word of mouth, I don’t bother to advertise,” Hercules informs him, bristling.

“I’m sure,” Jefferson says, but he does follow him inside. Herc had been half hoping he wouldn’t, with that attitude.

Once inside, Jefferson reveals the suit. It’s a very blue pink, and he’s certain he has nothing strong enough to match it.

“We aren’t going to duplicate the color exactly. Especially with the sheen of this fabric, versus a lighter silk I’d use for a cravat. I suggest we take the lightest pink I’ve got, and I overdye it with just a hint of blue, if it’s on the redder end of the pink spectrum,” Herc says immediately.

Jefferson looks intrigued. “I hadn’t thought of a paler color. I want it to be a statement piece.”

“A soft pink silk cravat, especially one overdyed with just a trace of blue, is going to turn heads. Trust me. Now, as busy as your coat already is, we don’t want too much movement. It’ll become chaotic and lessen the impact. I suggest a very simple cut,” Hercules says, showing the soon to be President two sketches of cravats with minimal lace adornment.

“White lace?” Dolley asks. “You won’t match the color.”

“No lace,” Hercules counters. “Let the color stand for itself, and the slim cut will be impactful without being lost in the movement. The overdye will give it a distinct texture on its own.”

“You do know your stuff,” Jefferson says, sounding surprised. “You really should’ve taken your old war buddy under your wing- Hamilton could’ve done with your sartorial advice, peacocking around town. This one, I think,” he says, picking the right of the two sketches Hercules has shown him.

Herc has to take a deep breath to keep from cursing the President elect out. He remembers how deeply Jefferson’s insults about his dress and manners had struck, when Alex first met the other man. He’d been terrified of appearing too low class and embarrassing Washington, and Jefferson’s remarks had convinced him he’d never do more than imitate true good breeding, and badly at that.

Nevermind that Alex was never, in Hercules’ opinion, more of a peacock than Jefferson. His outfits are legendary in tailor’s circles, themselves. And having designed most of Alex’s wardrobe himself, Hercules is quite sure that it’s all fashionable, durable, and in good taste, if a little heavy on the French influence. Still, he’s too smart to alienate a man as well connected as Jefferson, so he bites his tongue.

“I’ll get to work, and send the finished product along with Burr,” he promises shortly, wanting to get the other man out of his workspace before he loses hold of his frayed temper.

Jefferson agrees, then hands him nearly double what he would normally have charged for a cravat- even one he’s gone to the trouble of dyeing. He raises an eyebrow, and the curly haired man tells him, “For the inconvenience of the rush job, of course.”

“Thank you,” Hercules tells him, and Thomas Jefferson finally walks out of his store. Hercules finds the perfect fabric and dyes enough for the project, and it’s drying by the time the apprentice from Mulligan’s arrives with the fabric he’d requested.

He makes good progress with the afternoon, cutting his pieces and laying them out to baste the next day. As he works, he wonders what on earth he’s going to tell Alex.

 

Chapter 11: Chapter 11: Sewing

Summary:

Hercules sews, and listens.

Notes:

Guys, this almost didn't get posted today, I'm so sorry! But here we go. Please let me know what you think! This is a very conversation, emotion heavy chapter for sure, but I wanted to explore it all with them!

In other news, I think I've figured out how this one ends, and the end is coming fast. Then, I've got either a one shot about Herc observing Alex and Aaron or a character study of Laf exploring his whole non-dynamic thing coming up next!

Chapter Text

Hercules is at the shop early the next day, laying out and basting pieces for Maria’s dress. His head tailor has sent over Susan to help with Burr’s suit, and he puts her to work on the pants and vest for the morning, so he can send her back in the afternoon and the other shop’s work won’t suffer.

He’s very pleased with how quickly he’s able to work up the white underlayer. It’s basted together by mid morning, which is good, because Maria's promised to come try it on after lunch, in the undergarments she’ll wear to the ball. He turns his attention to laying out and basting Burr’s coat.

By lunchtime, the pants are done, the coat is ready for fitting, and the vest is close. He sends Susan back to Mulligan’s, asking her to let Henry know he needs her again for as much of the next day as possible and Emily back to man the front and do ribbon work the day after, and applies himself to readying Burr’s vest for fitting.

He’s just finishing up when the shop door opens, admitting Maria, Aaron, and Alex. “Hello!” he says, standing to greet them. “You’re looking lovely as ever, Miss Lewis,” he says, clasping her warmly. He hugs Alex tight for a long moment, relieved to see he’s moving easily and none the worse for the wear. He’d mostly trusted Burr’s assurances that Alex wasn’t in trouble for his less than mannerly ‘reveal’, but it’s good to be certain.

Burr, he greets with a warm handclasp and a pat on the back, clearly surprising the other man. He remembers the weird instinct he’d had the day before to defend Burr to Jefferson. He does the strangest things, to please Alex. Apparently, befriending Aaron Burr is going to be one of them.

He sends the two to changing areas- Maria, the curtained off section of the shop where he usually does fittings and measurements and Burr into the back storeroom- and he and Alex sit back to wait for their return.

“I wrote Laf,” Alex announces. He sounds almost frightened.

“I’m glad. Thank you,” Herc tells him, wrapping an arm around him and tugging him close. Alex leans against him. “Did you tell him?” he asks.

“I did,” Alex admits. He looks up nervously. “Do you think he’ll be upset?”

“That you’ve found love? How could he?” Herc asks gently.

“That it’s Burr, I mean,” Alex confesses. “Things were complicated. John’s history with him and everything. And I always thought Laf resented him.”

“He did. Laf resented the hell out of Burr, because he adored John and there was something Burr could give him that Laf couldn’t, and there was a time John went looking for that and Laf was afraid we’d lose him. It only got worse when you showed up. We were all so protective of you, and Burr came around a lot more- he always seemed to care what you were up to. Laf got territorial.” Herc tries to explain it without making excuses for his friend, unsure whether Alex now resents Lafayette’s protective instincts.

For all the other man is proudly non-dynamic, he’d been as territorial as any Dom when Burr was around. His hatred of the other man became a thing of legend among the group. If Burr showed up and counseled discretion or tried to settle Alex, John showed his teeth and Laf pushed Alex as hard as he could into whatever it was Burr didn’t want him doing. Herc had tried to keep them calm, but he’d been territorial too.

It’s not a slight on what Alex had felt for John, or for either of them. Herc knows Alex loved them all truly,  just as he was able to add Eliza to his heart without removing any of them, and shift Hercules’ place in his life to work with his very much not open marriage. But what Alex and Aaron felt for each other had always been obvious, even if Alex hadn’t seen it- or had deliberately written it off as impossible. And some part of each of them had felt it, and railed against it. Because they may all have been happy to share, but he’d never have thought Burr would. That he shares Alex now with his wife is genuinely baffling to Hercules.

“He’s talking about being able to visit. Not soon, but in the foreseeable future,” Alex confesses.

“I know. He’s told me. And I think he was going to throw the advisability of leaving so soon after being pardoned out the window and grab the next boat over if you didn’t write to him, so he could grovel in person. He doesn’t do well without his little lion.” With John gone, Laf is more protective of Alex than ever, even from so far away. Hercules knows Washington had kept Laf apprised of Alex’s state while he was alive, since the General had seen far more of their little lion than Herc had.

“Adrienne wouldn’t have let him do that,” Alex argues. “It’s too risky!”

Hercules throws his head back and laughs. He’d made one trip to Europe with Lizzy, back during Washington’s presidency, and met Adrienne in person. Alex only knows her through letters. If he thinks she’s any less passionate and prone to action than Laf, he’s in for quite a surprise when he meets her. “Addy would’ve probably come with him, carrying a suitcase of the family silver in case they couldn’t get home!” he tells Alex.

Before they can say any more, Burr comes out of the fitting room. “Really, Hercules?” he says, but his tone is more amused than disgruntled.

“You like the liner?” Herc says with an unabashed smile.

“I mean, if you were going to make me a peacock, I suppose it’s the best way you could’ve done it,” Burr concedes. “I should’ve known what I was getting into, giving you two control over my outfit,” he says, shooting his sub a wink.

Hercules laughs, placing a couple of pins for minor adjustments and sending him out to change as Maria comes out. “It fits beautifully,” she reports, and Herc has to admit, it really, really does. She’s in a different corset, but the lines are still smooth- the sheath hangs perfectly without bunching, which is great, since he’s going to include a great deal of gathers in the overlayer.

He drapes some of the red, machined silk mesh over it, letting her see. “You’re going to be stunning,” he tells her. “We’ll use ribbon for the waist, but I’ve got a girl who can do simple ribbon embroidery faster than you would believe, and it will hardly take more time than hemming it would have. She can finish the edge as she goes, this stuff doesn’t fray.”

She smiles at him, shyly delighted. “I’ll feel like a princess,” she says.

“That’s the goal.” He offers her a hand to step off the small platform. “I’ll let you get changed, then I’ll get to work on the over-layer.”

Alex is grinning at him when both of them have retreated to change back into their everyday clothes. “They both look stunning,” he says.

“You do surround yourself with beautiful people. What are you and Eliza going to wear?”

“She’s got that sage colored dress with the gorgeous embroidery she wore to Martha’s for Christmas,” Alex says. “I’m considering wearing mourning black.”

“Don’t, Alex,” Hercules says sternly. “Antagonizing the President isn’t going to make things any easier with you coming and going to see Aaron. Don’t make trouble where there isn’t any.”

Alex pouts at him. “Wear the emerald velvet we did a couple of years ago. I’ll do you a black cravat as your nod to mourning if you really want it,” Hercules promises.

“Aren’t colored cravats too trendy for formal wear?” Alex asks. “Aaron seemed to think so.”

“Well, the President will be wearing one,” Hercules reveals.

“Well, I can’t be flayed for bad taste if I’m mimicking him. Though I don’t like thinking of following his lead on anything,” Alex says. “How do you know what Jefferson is wearing?”

“He came into Mulligan’s looking for a cravat. Dolley Madison was with him, and very stressed that no one would make him a colorful one for evening wear. I agreed to do it before I realized who it was for,” Hercules confesses. “She said to give you her love- she’d missed you, visiting Eliza.”

Alex, to his surprise, laughs. “You’ve been had. Dolley wasn’t upset, she saw your ‘knight in shining armor’ thing, and made herself into a damsel in distress. Nothing in the world could ruffle that woman, Thomas Jefferson and his histrionics included.”

Herc is too pleased that Alex isn’t upset with him to be mad at the idea. “Well, then I’ve been taken. You wily submissives, tricking me into sewing fashion statements. Though ‘sensible navy velvet’ is farther from what I usually do than ‘pink evening cravat’,” he teases.

“But you love me enough to do it anyway!” Alex reminds him.

“That I do,” Hercules admits.

“And we’re all incredibly grateful,” Burr says, coming out of the storeroom. Hercules is glad the other man isn’t as territorial as he’d have expected- he doesn’t bat an eye at his sub cuddling up to another Dom.

“There’s little I wouldn’t do for Alex, Burr,” Hercules assures him meaningfully. He’s absolutely not looking to usurp the other man’s place. He’s happily married to a wife who unequivocally does not share. But his relationship with Alex isn’t about that anymore- it’s settled into a sense of brotherhood he can’t imagine sharing with anyone but Alex and Laf.

“I think he knows that, and counts on it. Thank you for that,” Burr tells him. Hercules nearly lets his jaw drop in shock. It’s as if Aaron doesn’t feel the need to defend his territory at all, so long as anyone encroaching is doing so for Alex’s own good. “Alex, why don’t you check on Maria? And Hercules, can you come look at this lining?” the Dom says. Maybe he’s more territorial than he’s let on, and doesn’t want his sub to know.

Alex goes, and the two Doms retreat to the storeroom. “I’m not trying to start a pissing match, Mulligan,” Aaron says, seeing the way Hercules has bristled. “But I’m going to be in DC a lot, coming up. And I want to make sure he doesn’t feel alone. Eliza and Maria are his family, and Angelica, but you are too, in a very real way. I want to… I guess make it clear that I won’t consider it a challenge if you visit my sub while I’m gone. And ask you to visit him, so he doesn’t feel so isolated, I suppose,” Burr explains.

Burr is apparently a lot less of a stick in the mud than Hercules ever would’ve given him credit for. “You’re not worried about rules of propriety?” he challenges.

“My sub is married, to a submissive woman who has another submissive lover. I’m obviously not nearly as invested in appearances and formalities as I once thought I was, if they get in the way of what Alex needs. And he needs his friends,” Burr says firmly. “Besides, I’ve thrown all of my ‘show off my sub’ instincts out the window, because Alex isn’t ready for people to know about us. No one will know anything is unusual at all.”

“You’re a good man, Aaron Burr,” Hercules decides. “And of course I’ll be there for him.”

“Good. Thank you. I appreciate it. I’m not asking you to do anything improper, or report back to me, I just want to know he’s got his support network,” Aaron assures him.

“Laf may turn up sooner or later, too,” Hercules reveals. “Possibly sooner- Alex has been out of touch and it’s driving him crazy.”

Aaron looks concerned. “I’ll talk to him, see if I can get him to write Lafayette,” he promises. “I won’t force him- his personal matters are his concern. But I can’t help suspecting I’m part of the reason for the silence.”

“He said he wrote him yesterday. So it’s just a matter of how fast the letter reaches Laf, and whether he’s already on a boat when it gets to France. I told him to give it a little while longer- of course, I didn’t know what the problem was then either- but Laf loves our little lion, and he can’t bear to think he’s lost Alex’s affection,” Hercules explains.

“Isn’t the situation precarious over there?” Burr says, looking concerned.

“He’s been pardoned and allowed to return home. He was living in exile. It would be better for him not to try to leave the country just yet, but I was maybe a week from going to see Alex to be able to reassure Laf he’s fine, myself. I’m used to Alex dropping in and out of contact. He’s been much better about writing Laf. The three of us- me, Alex, and Adrienne- were the only thing that kept him tethered, when he was in exile. And he took losing Washington almost as hard as Alex did, but couldn’t get back for the funeral. It’s all complicated,” Hercules says.

“If he needs to see Alex, he needs to see him. And if that happens, I’ll come home regardless of whatever is going on in DC,” Burr decides.

“You don’t have to worry about Lafayette poaching him,” Herc assures him.

“No, but a reunion like that is going to be emotional. I’d rather Alex didn’t have to face what I’m sure will be Lafayette’s horror over our relationship alone,” Aaron explains. “I remember how upset John was, when we got serious and Lafayette didn’t like it.”

Herc winces, wishing he’d kept his mouth shut. But he still thinks it’s better to keep lines of communication open with Alex’s new Dom, especially given how reasonable Burr is being. But their history is complicated, even more than Alex knows. The fit Laf had thrown over John and Burr is definitely a big part of it, and all that had happened before they met Alex.

“He’s matured a lot,” he assures the other Dom.

“I’m sure he has. Doesn’t make him any less protective of the people he loves. I can respect that. And I respect how much Alex loves him. But I won’t leave my sub to deal with him without my support, in case things get ugly,” Aaron insists.

“Hopefully, he’ll get Alex’s letter before doing anything drastic. He was planning on writing to him again, when I heard from him a few days ago, before he did anything else. Even if Alex has already gotten that letter- from what Laf said, it was going to be his third or fourth attempt at reaching out- he’ll give him a little while to respond before he does anything,” Herc assures the other man.

“That’s good,” Burr says, but he still looks concerned.

“Look, if those two could survive Laf raving for years about his new buddy Thomas, only for he and Alex to become mortal enemies on sight and Gil spending the next several years trying to get them to get along while Alex plotted his demise, they can work through this,” Herc assures him.

Aaron actually laughs. “Oh, God, I’d never considered that. Jefferson was in France for years, didn’t he help Lafayette with their Declaration? And until the election, I’d have sworn Thomas was the only person in the world Alex hated more than me.”

“They are the source of my grey hair, even more than the boys. At least my actual children eventually learned to deal with their problems without my help,” Hercules says, but his tone is fond. “Speaking of children getting into trouble, we should probably get back out there before Alex comes looking for us.”

Alex and Maria are back in the front, and Alex fixes both of them with a searching look as soon as he sees them. “Did you get the lining sorted out?” he asks pointedly. Herc winces, wondering how Aaron handles public disrespect and hoping he’s not about to find out firsthand. Alex’s tone was openly doubtful- his accusation couldn’t be more clear.

“We discussed what we needed to, yes, thank you,” Aaron tells him blandly.

“If you’re going to discuss me behind my back, you could at least try to be subtle about it,” Alex says snidely. Herc sighs. Beside Alex, Maria is looking nervous.

“I could, if I were trying to hide it from you,” Aaron says levelly. “Do you think either Herc or I have any interest in hurting you?” Alex shakes his head, but his expression is mulish. “Good, because we don’t. And if we don’t want to hurt you, then there’s nothing to worry about, about us talking, is there?” he asks.

“I guess not,” Alex admits.

“Hercules would tell you, if I said anything concerning. Whether I wanted him to or not,” Aaron assures his sub.

“It’s true,” Herc admits, startled. Most Doms would consider that interference, at best. Not that it would stop him, mind you. But Burr seems to be totally fine with it, and Alex does look reassured.

“Now,” Aaron says, “Maria probably wants to be getting home.”

Maria nods. “I do, if you’re done,” she says.

“I’m not done. We just got here. I want to talk to Herc,” Alex says stubbornly.

Aaron is being amazingly non-territorial, but Alex is apparently determined to push him into it. Herc tenses slightly, waiting for the Dom to explode and wondering if he’d be dumb enough to try to hurt Alex in front of him. Obviously Herc will kill him if he tries, but Burr wouldn’t be the first Dom to lose his shit in response to his sub picking another Dom over him to spend time with.

“Are you alright with me taking Maria home, then? I can either get back to packing or come back here, afterwards,” Aaron offers.

Herc stares at him. Alex looks surprised, too. “You’re okay with me staying? You’re not going to supervise?” he asks.

“Alex, I don’t need to read your letters to Lafayette, and I don’t need to be in the room every time you talk to Hercules. You act like I expect to be with you every hour of every day!” Aaron says. Now, he sounds frustrated.

“No,” Alex admits. “You let me go where I want.”

“There is no let, Alex. You are an adult. I trust you to make your own decisions, since you’ve proven you’re capable of taking care of yourself. Now, if you start bare knuckle boxing in taverns, we may have to revisit that. But I do not own you. I do not want to own you. I want to own the part of your heart you’re willing to give me, and keep it safe. I want to be part of your life, not the ruler of it,” Burr tells him.

That was quite a speech. Alex shakes his head, obviously unsure of what to say. “I’ll see you at home?” he tries.

“I’ll see you there.” Before he goes, Aaron stops to kiss his sub deeply, one hand wrapping around the side of his neck by his ear. It doesn’t look like restraint- more like cradling. Like Alex is something precious Burr can barely believe he’s allowed to touch.

Burr nods to Hercules as well, and Maria wishes him a good day, and then he and Alex are alone in the shop. “Come on, I need to keep working,” Herc decides. Having something in his hands to do always helps him process.

He hands Alex Burr’s waistcoat, to replace the basting with permanent seams, since it didn’t need any alteration. He taught Alex to sew, beginning with simple repairs then alterations as he’d finally begun to fill out after a lifetime of near starvation, and Alex knows how to follow his stitches and make small, even ones that will hold up.

Herc begins draping Maria’s overlayer on his dress form, pinning as he goes, and Alex climbs directly onto the work table, sitting cross legged with his back against the wall. He’s never liked that Herc’s workspace is full of stools, instead of chairs. Alex likes to have something solid at his back.

“That was weird,” Alex says after a long moment. “I think I owe Aaron an apology?”

Herc hums noncommittally, his mouth full of pins. He agrees, but he’s surprised to hear Alex say it.

“He says it’s okay that I don’t trust him yet, but I know it hurts him,” Alex admits.

“He what?” Herc asks, shocked. Absolute, blind trust and obedience are the first things most Doms demand.

“He says all he wants is my heart. And for me to let him take care of me, and keep me safe. He says he can’t force me to trust him, he has to earn my trust, but my trust issues have nothing to do with Aaron,” Alex explains. 

“No,” Herc agrees, “Those predate us all.”

“I trust you and Laf. I trusted John. And the General.” Alex adds the last two quietly, and Herc reaches out to squeeze his ankle. The memories still hurt, sometimes.

“But you never trusted any of us as much as you’re trying to trust him. Washington came closest. Alex, you still don’t trust Laf and I to love you no matter what. If you did, you wouldn’t have been afraid to tell us about Burr,” Herc points out. “I don’t think you’ve ever trusted anybody but Eliza that much.”

Alex hums thoughtfully. “She didn’t… Liza loved me before I knew I needed her to,” he says thoughtfully.

“Watching the two of you fall in love was beautiful,” Herc agrees.

“I think I overthink it. When I know I want, no, really, when I know I need someone to love me, I’m worried they won’t. I know what I’ve got to lose,” he says. “Eliza… I had no expectations. It was like I opened a door, and suddenly I was home when I hadn’t been home in so long I’d half forgotten it.”

“Eliza Hamilton is the human embodiment of love,” Hercules agrees. “And you have that. Whatever happens with Burr. You have that, and you have Maria, and you have me and Laf. No matter what, Alex,” he promises.

“My mind knows he loves me. Truly, he really loves me, Herc. And I love him.” Alex fingers the edge of Burr’s vest slightly as he says it. “I figured I’d more than had my share, you know? That John was going to be the only person I could ever really submit to. And at least I got that, for a little while.”

Hercules hesitates. Mulls over what he wants to say. Tests the words as they come out, feeling them out to make sure they’re true. “John would want you to let yourself have this,” he says.

“John would want me not to submit. To anyone,” Alex counters.

“John would have ripped the head off on anyone who tried to make you submit. From where I’m standing, Burr isn’t forcing you. Is he?” Herc asks searchingly. If any part of Alex feels coerced, John won’t need to come back from the dead to protect Alex. He’ll do it himself.

Alex laughs. “Aaron doesn’t force. He coaxes. He makes me want to make him happy, even if I wouldn’t normally want to do whatever it is that makes him happy.” Alex looks baffled.

“That’s submission, ‘Lex,” Herc tells him.

Alex looks stunned. “Then I guess I’ve never really done it before?” he asks. “Not like this. I mean, I’ve done things because one of you or one of the girls or the Washingtons or Phillip wanted me to…” he hesitates.

“It’s different. I am making a navy blue velvet suit, when I already had so many commissions I wasn’t taking more until next month and I swore I was done with boring blue suits, because I love you enough to cancel out the inconvenience and then some,” Herc explains. “But that’s a judgement call I made, something I considered.”

“Sometimes, when Burr wants me to do something, it doesn’t even occur to me not to want it. Like kneeling,” Alex admits. Herc freezes. He literally cannot imagine Alex on his knees. The other man has always been too proud, too skittish. Even now, he’s put himself on a higher surface to sit, so Herc doesn’t tower over him.

“He makes you kneel?” he asks quietly, when Alex doesn’t say anything else.

“He lets me kneel,” Alex corrects wonderingly. “He lets me have the space where I don’t have to think, or plan, or decide, I just get to be. When I’m kneeling, I don’t have to do anything but be. He takes on everything else. Even if he’s tired, or stressed. If I need that, he lets me. He offers, when I wouldn’t dare ask.”

“You trust him more than you think,” Hercules says, turning away to look at the back of Maria’s dress so Alex doesn’t see the look on his face. He’s moved, thrilled, and shocked by the way Alex talks about Burr.

“I trust him with me. With my body, that was easy. He couldn’t do any real damage, I’d have stopped him. But I trust him with my mind, too,” Alex realizes. “And my soul. Who I am. I can turn that over to him and know he’ll keep it safe.”

“Just not your heart,” Herc realizes.

“The very thing he asked for. The only thing he asked for,” Alex admits.

“Alex,” Herc asks delicately, “Do you not trust him, or do you not feel worthy of him?”

Alex’s head thunks against the wall. “How could I? The class differences are obvious. I’m still a street rat, just a gilded one nowadays. And the character differences… Burr is a good man. He was one of the first to go into battle for our country, even if John didn’t think he was brave enough to fight. And while I’ve been off being showy, wanting people to see that I mattered, he’s just been toiling along, taking care of the people around him, his community… whoever needed him. Do you know he’s who got Maria away from Reynolds, the first time? Even when she decided to go back- she was worried Reynolds would hurt Theo- she said Aaron was always her escape plan, if she just couldn’t take it.”

“You’ve never had a very accurate view of yourself, Alex,” Herc tells him. “You’re one of the bravest men I know, even if it scares me to death sometimes. And sure, there are fewer widows and puppies who credit you with personally saving them. But you spent those years fighting to save us all, by building a functional government. And don’t try to tell me you didn’t do that to help people.”

“And I’m spiteful and tempestuous and my entire life is built on a lie,” Alex reminds him.

“Passionate, unwilling to give up on what you believe in, and willing to bury the very essence of who you are, so that you could do what our country needed you to,” Herc corrects.

“You’re not perfect, Alex. Nobody is. Aaron knows that you have flaws. He’s known you long enough to learn most of them. You’ll find Aaron’s flaws. I seem to recall you being pretty vocal about them a few months ago. He doesn’t think he’s perfect, Alex. And he doesn’t expect you to pretend he is. No sane Dom does. You’ll both make mistakes. You’ll hurt each other. Both of you. Even if it’s the last thing you want. Just like you and Eliza have,” Herc reminds him. “But just like you and Eliza did, you’ll find ways to work through it, and come out stronger on the other side. If he’s worth fighting for. Is he?” Herc asks gently.

“He’s worth it. Worth anything,” Alex tells him immediately. “It’s not just him, and how much I need him. It’s who I am when I’m with him. I can just be me, Herc. And that’s worth it.”

They lapse into silence, each sewing their respective projects for a few minutes. Then, Alex says, “People are going to find out.”

Herc doesn’t argue. He’s probably right. Instead he lets Alex speak. “I never slept around, even when Eliza told me to. Because every moment I’m in that headspace, or living that way, it’s a chance for someone to find out. A servant is disgruntled, or just accidentally says something revealing. Someone sees us coming and going. I move differently, either because we’ve been playing or because I’m just looser, when I’m in that mindset.”

“God, Alex, no wonder you can’t let go and trust him the rest of the way. You’re expecting your entire world to implode any second you’re with him, aren’t you?” Herc asks.

“It’s not if, it’s when,” Alex argues.

“Then get it over with!” Herc tells him. “Do it on your terms, and damn them all.” He’s never understood why Alex is so terrified of his secret. When they were young, it made sense. He wanted to make his name. But nobody can say Alexander’s reputation doesn’t precede him now, and Herc can’t imagine his sex life changing that.

Alex looks so wary, scared in a way Herc hasn’t seen him in years, as he confesses, “I can’t, Herc. I just can’t.” He hunches his shoulders, obviously expecting Herc to be upset with him.

“Then you can’t  And so you won’t. And it will be fine. You and Aaron will handle it. I’ll have your back, and if that isn’t enough Laf will undoubtedly show up to back us up. I seem to recall there never was much we couldn’t handle,” Herc assures him, reaching out to clasp his hand.

Alex squeezes back, granting him a soft smile. “Thanks, Herc.”

“You’re welcome.” Alex has finished seaming the vest, he notices. “That looks good.”

Alex smiles at the praise. “It does, doesn’t it?”

“He’ll look great. And even if no one knows it, you’ll be the reason,” Herc tells him.

“I guess I can live with that,” Alex says, smiling and standing up. “Will you be okay if I head home?”

“Of course. I’ll see you soon?” Herc offers.

“I’ll come for the next fitting,” Alex promises.

Herc smiles at him. “Then I suppose I’d better get your cravat made, too.”

Alex grins, and Herc hugs him tight before watching him leave. He’s relieved, in a way he can’t really articulate. Finally, he’s sure Alex is going to be okay.

Chapter 12: Facing The Future

Summary:

Alex processed with Hercules at the shop. For years, that's what he's done when faced with something life altering.

Now, he goes home to tell Aaron about it.

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

“I love you,” Alex says when he walks into Burr’s office, which is actually currently occupied by Burr, not Alex, for once.

“I love you too,” Aaron says, immediately pushing away from his desk. Alex’s throat catches a little at that. The way Aaron walks away from whatever else he’s doing, from anything else, when he thinks Alex needs him.

“No, I’m fine, you get back to work,” he assures his Dom. This can wait. He just hopes he doesn’t lose his nerve.

“This is nothing. Jefferson apparently came by while we were having breakfast with the girls. He brought me the key to the Vice President’s residence, and left a list of things he wants me to do before the inauguration,” Burr waves it off. “I’ve got time.”

“What does he want you to do?” Alex asks, intrigued.

“Mainly research the people Adams has added to the Supreme Court. It sounds like he thinks Adams is trying to stack the court against him,” Burr says. “I don’t remember him being this paranoid.”

Alex vaguely remembers sending Adams that letter about Marbury and hopes sincerely that he’s not one of the people his Dom is looking into. “But it’s busy work, Alex. We know these men, by reputation if not by conversation. What did you need?”

“I love you,” Alex begins again, getting back on track.

“I love you, too,” Burr assures him, waiting patiently for him to continue.

Alex takes a deep breath. “I want to be brave enough to shout it from the rooftops. But I’m not, yet. And I love you even more for being patient with me. I just want you to know… what I’m ashamed of… it isn’t you. It could never be you. You’re amazing. You’re perfect-”

“Just perfect for you, Alex. Like you’re perfect for me,” Aaron corrects him.

“Even though I’m too scared to be seen with you in public, officially?” Alex asks, insecurity creeping into his voice.

“Especially when you’re brave enough to be with me in private, even though you’re terrified of somebody finding out,” Aaron corrects gently.

“You said I’m allowed to have things I just can’t stand,” Alex says. “You are, too. How much does it bother you, nobody knowing?”

“What do you mean nobody, sweetheart? Eliza knows, and Maria, and Angelica. They’re your family. Theo knows. She’s mine. And now Hercules and Lafayette know, and they’re your closest friends. I think that’s a pretty good group,” Aaron assures him.

“What about your closest friends? I don’t even know who your closest friends are,” Alex laments.

“Well, that’s complicated.” Aaron sighs, propping his hip up on the edge of his desk and clasping his hands in front of him. “Theodosia was my best friend. We had couple friends, but they mostly drifted away when she died. Will Van Ness is still a good friend. But other than him, I suppose I’ve spent most of the last couple of years with Thomas and James. And you know how that turned out,” Aaron admits.

Alex stares at him, suddenly concerned. “Don’t worry, Alex. I’m not a very social person. I don’t feel… isolated, or alone.”

“What do you mean, you aren’t a social person? You were always checking on me, wanting to talk or grab a drink. You were the one who always made sure we found time to catch up!” Alex exclaims, surprised.

Aaron raises an eyebrow at him. “Oh,” Alex says, realization dawning. Aaron isn’t just an incredibly friendly guy, like he’d always assumed. He’d been reaching out to him, specifically, because of how he felt.

“Why did you decide to run against Jefferson?” Alex asks.

“Well, originally it was a plan we all came up with, to get two Democratic Republicans on the ballot and whip Adams completely. Then, to make sure I beat Adams, I started campaigning. Jefferson is a legend. The man wrote the Declaration. When we decided we’d both run, we didn’t expect me to gain any real traction. Not like I did. When I got too popular, James told me to pull out. Said I should throw my support to Jefferson, and then maybe after he’d had his time as President, they’d help me get elected. But the plan was always for James to serve after Thomas, and I wasn’t willing to wait around sixteen years,” Aaron admits. “Or more. Washington stopped at two terms, there’s no saying anyone else will.”

Aaron smiles. “They called us ‘Burr’s faction’ and said we were practically ‘new Hamiltonians’. I said we were Democratic Republicans for the everyman of the North. Those two were always more focused on what was best for the South. I guess I felt like maybe people really needed something new, and I liked the feeling that I could be the one to change things up and help them.”

“You would’ve been a good President. No matter what I said,” Alex tells him. It feels imperative, that Aaron knows that, and knows Alex knows too.

“Thank you. But Alex, I’m not dwelling on that. I can’t believe I got this far. I’m about to be sworn in as the Vice President of the United States. I’m in a relationship with a man I’ve loved since I was twenty. And somehow, you’ve made me part of your family. I haven’t had a family in a very long time. Not with other adults, who supported each other,” Aaron confesses. “It’s all going pretty well for me.”

Alex had never looked at it like that. He’s an ‘all or nothing’ guy. Burr is more of a ‘count your blessings’ person. From that perspective, having the Vice Presidency is still a win. Having Alex, even if it’s a secret, is apparently a win, too. That makes him feel better.

“People are going to find out, sooner or later,” Alex announces.

Aaron stands back up, looking concerned. “We’ll be careful. And discreet. We have been for months.”

“People will find out,” Alex repeats, licking his lips. “They were always going to. I’ve known that… I’ve known since the moment I agreed to be yours that it was only a matter of time.”

“Alex, honey, we can handle this,” Aaron assures him, coming within reach but looking strangely hesitant. “We can handle it together,” Aaron adds, and Alex realizes what he thinks.

“No! Aaron, no. I’m not panicking. I’m not backing out because I’m scared. I wouldn’t do that to you. I couldn’t. And if I was stupid enough to try, I think Eliza’d truss me up and leave me on your pillow in DC as a housewarming gift,” Alex tells his Dom.

Aaron breathes a sigh of relief. “Good. Good. That’s terrific. Thank you. Thank God,” he says, obviously relaxing.

“I’m not ready for people to know, yet,” Alex repeats. Aaron nods. Of course, he already knows that. And he’s been nothing but patient and supportive.

“But I need to get ready. And I want to be ready,” Alex says with some difficulty.

“Remember, neither of us controls your feelings,” Aaron tells him warily.

Alex smiles. Protective as always, that’s his Dom. “But we control how I respond to them,” Alex reminds him. “Aaron, I let you restrain me. I told Herc I trust you with my body, and my mind, and my soul. If I can’t trust you with my heart yet, that’s less about you than about me not feeling like my heart is something worth taking care of,” he admits.

“Sweetheart.” That’s all Aaron says before pulling him close. Alex goes happily, letting his Dom wrap him up in warm, strong arms. When Aaron tilts Alex’s head up for a kiss, he melts into the other man with a contented sigh.

After a long kiss and a few minutes of languid snuggling, Alex remembers he had been trying to make a point. 

“I don’t want to run from who I am anymore,” he says decisively, twisting slightly in his Dom’s arms to look at him directly. “I know it’s going to be a process. I’m just saying I want to start trying.”

“We can do that, Alex. But on your terms. We aren’t cutting the horse free and sending it galloping off, we’re loosening the reins until it can go. You decide how we do that,” Aaron says decisively.

“You can tell your friend Will. If you think he can keep a secret,” Alex allows. “I can trust your judgement on the people you want to know. As long as it’s not, you know…” He trails off. He’s trying, here, to open things up a little more and stop hiding. But the idea of Jefferson knowing his secret makes him break out in a cold sweat.

“I have no interest in sharing details of my personal life with Jefferson or Madison, anymore. Jefferson has made it clear that our friendship is a thing of the past, since I had the audacity to stand up to him,” Aaron assures his sub.

“You’re lucky to be rid of him. James is harder. He was my friend once, too. But he picks Jefferson over any of us, and I know I can’t overcome that,” Alex admits.

“Yes, I’ve exchanged a few letters with James. I imagine it’s much the same for him as it would be for me if Adams tried to reach out to me. Yes, he’s a potentially useful contact. But being friendly with him would hurt my sub, so whether anyone can ever know why or not, I won’t be,” Aaron muses.

“I asked Eliza not to tell Dolley anything about us,” Alex confesses, stepping away from Aaron to pace as he talks. “They’re almost as close as she is with Angelica or Peggy. Usually, she tells her everything. But we can’t expect Dolley not to tell James, and James would tell Jefferson, who would use it against me however he could. Against both of us.”

“I think that’s a wise choice. I’m sorry we’ve put Eliza in that situation,” Aaron agrees.

“She says it’s no problem. She’s blamed my absence on the paper. Dolley is used to me being a workaholic,” Alex admits. “Though the paper hardly needs me popping in at all, much less there every day to run the place.”

“I’m glad she had a good cover ready,” Aaron says.

“You’ve pointed out before that subbing and being a submissive aren’t the same. It’s not totally crazy that, as a switch, I might sub sometimes,” Alex says next.

“It isn’t,” Aaron agrees patiently.

“I want to work up to revealing that much. To just not being afraid to be seen with you in public, and eventually to intentionally coming out as your date. You’ll be attending so many terrible dinners, and you shouldn’t have to go to all of them alone,” Alex says.

Aaron stares at him, shocked. “Alex,” he breathes.

“Unless you don’t want that?” Alex asks, losing his nerve. He’d never considered what he’d do if Aaron wasn’t on board with this plan. His Dom would be stepping out with the man who cost him the Presidency, after all.

Aaron catches him up in his arms before he can back peddle, kissing the breath out of him. Aaron’s hands seem to be everywhere at once, and he backs Alex into the desk and then lifts him onto it, trapping him there. There’s nowhere else Alex would rather be.

When Aaron comes up for air, he presses their foreheads together. “Of course I want that. When, and only when, you’re ready. Alex, I’m madly in love with you. I want to shout it from the rooftops. I don’t care what anyone thinks of me as a Dominant or as a politician, so long as they know I’m yours.”

The depth of love in Aaron’s eyes astounds him. Pressed as close together as they are, Aaron is all he can see. And all, in this moment, that he cares about. “Show me?” he asks, nipping at his Dom’s jaw.

Aaron somehow manages to pick him up and take them the few steps to the couch, laying Alex along it on his back and following him down. His Dom seems to be determined to kiss every inch of his body, starting with his face.

Aaron kisses his jaw, leaning back to say, “I love how stubborn you are. You never give in to anything that isn’t right, just to make the problem go away.” Aaron kisses down his jaw until he’s close enough to kiss his lips, then adds, “You always have the right words to say.”

Alex arches up against his Dom as he unfastens Alex’s cravat to nip and suck at his neck. “I love how proud you are,” his Dom tells him. “You know you’re the smartest man in the room, and you refuse to be overlooked or ignored.”

Aaron finishes leaving a sharp mark on the side of Alex’s neck and begins licking and nipping at his Adam’s apple. “Seeing you with Eliza and Maria is beautiful. You and Betsy have built this wonderful family for yourselves, and I’m so grateful to be part of it,” he says, and Alex groans.

Aaron nips at his earlobe next. “You’re truly the perfect partner for me. You know what I want, even when I don’t say it. I’ve never been so well matched in bed,” the Dom tells him, releasing the delicate flesh of his ear and giving it a soft kiss before pecking him on the nose, “And you’re the most beautiful sight I’ve ever seen, whether I’m waking up beside you in bed or seeing you come in the door after a long day.” 

Aaron kisses him again, long and slow, and says, “You will always be the most beautiful thing in the world to me, and I’m going to spend every day I’ve got left on this earth thanking God for the ones I get to spend with you.”

Alex pulls his Dom against him, burying his face in Burr’s neck. It obviously does nothing to shield the sheen of tears that’s formed over his eyes- he knows his Dom has seen them, and if he begins to cry, Aaron is absolutely going to feel it. But he needs to hide from the intensity of what he’s feeling, right now, and he can’t think of a safer place in the world than Aaron’s arms.

“You’re my safe place. My coming home. My everything I thought I could never have. My bubble away from reality where I don’t have to be ‘Alexander Hamilton, Washington’s right hand man’ and I can just be Alex,” he breathes. “And I’m not scared any more that telling people will ruin that. Nothing could ruin what we have. Nothing could ruin this. Ruin us. We’re stronger than they ever dreamed,” he tells his Dom.

Aaron strokes his hair and leans in to kiss him, and Alex tilts his face up eagerly. Alexander Hamilton is madly in love with Aaron Burr. And he may not be ready to shout it from the rooftops yet, but just you wait.

 

Notes:

And we have reached the end, folks! I've loved writing this one!!
I have a Laf character study from the Revolutionary Era, as well as that Hercules observer one shot planned. And I'm thinking about doing an advent fic for Christmas? What do you guys think- would anyone want to read a fic I updated daily? (NOT long chapters, lol!)
Let me know what you like, and what you'd like to see! And to everyone who has stuck with me so far, THANK YOU! You guys are the best!

Series this work belongs to: