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Somewhere, in the signal group chat…
@IDidNotDoThatToACouch
I just don’t want to bail Europe out again
They’re honestly terrible allies
@SecOfDef
Take your mind off of it by bombing Yemen
It’s worked every time so far
@IDidNotDoThatToACouch
Great idea! Now where exactly…
@SecOfState
Just pick a place with the most innocent civilians. That way you’re bound to destress yourself, and distress everyone else!
@InvitedToGroupChat has invited 45 former presidents, a bunch of senators, and even more historical figures to the group chat
@CantWalkYetIDoMoreThanYou
What the fuck
And you can’t even pretend to be allies man…
@BirthedANation
I could keep my stroke hidden from the nation but you guys can’t even hide your war plans??
@CanedButNotAfraid
Hey so I thought we were supposed to care about people… even people in other countries…
@EverybodyLikesIke
Good to see the military-industrial complex working its wonders for everyone yet again…
@YesILoveFranceDealWithIt
Guys I thought we had divested away from a standing army and military. What did I tell you all?
@IDidNotDoThatToACouch
This is woke liberal nonsense. These presidents should be supporting me, not going against me!
@UnconditionallySurrenderToMe
And you, my friend, think civil rights are ‘woke liberal nonsense’. Go back to the kids’ table.