Chapter Text
Groups of people in black, formal clothing filled the venue, sitting in the rows of pews in silence. A dark casket laid in the front of the room, pictures of John surrounded the coffin, images of him smiling and looking happy all around. Alex sat in a row with Hercules, Lafayette and Aaron. None of them spoke, too overtaken with grief to convey any emotions. A priest cleared his throat and everyone went silent as the priest began to speak.
It was a while until people started reading their eulogies, walking to the front and speaking from little pieces of paper or just putting something together. After a few people talked, it was Alex’s turn. He took a deep breath and walked to the front, preparing to speak. He didn’t have anything to read off, he was just talking off his heart. He swallowed and started.
“...Hello, everyone. My name is Alexander Hamilton, I was a…a very close friend to John.”
Alex started. It was so quiet, you could hear a pin drop. Alex took another deep breath and continued.
“ I’d known him for a little over a year, yet we were closer than anyone else in my life. John was such a good friend…it would be impossible to put it into words. Although he was a little hot headed and violent, he was the kindest and most exciting person I've ever known.”
Alex said contently, all the memories and time they spent together. He swallowed his tears and moved forward.
“Everytime we’d hang out it was never boring. He made sure of that. Even when we got into disagreements and fights, I never saw bad in him. It makes me wonder how anyone could hurt such a good person.”
Alex paused at his own words, the reality of what he was saying coming to him. It made him remember the party, the entire reason he’s in that coffin and not breathing with them now. Alex suddenly felt himself speechless, unable to finish the eulogy in front of all these people.
“I…uh…John meant a lot to me. And I loved him with all my heart. That's-...that's all.”
Alex quickly sat back down. He could’ve sworn he heard some people gasp at his words. As he sat down, he could feel John’s father glaring knives into the back of his head.
A few other people spoke before the open casket viewing began. A line of people went to see John’s body, Alex included. People stood there for a few moments, maybe mumbled something under their breath before walking away to the others eating and talking. Alex got to the coffin, staring down at John’s lifeless body. It was exactly how it looked on the hospital bed, the only differences being that he was dressed up in a suit and he didn’t have bandages or an oxygen machine. Alex inhaled, staring for a bit too long. Alex blinked and realized he was standing idly, moving to where everyone else was.
People conversed around the food table, much less speaking than eating. Alex joined Lafayette and Hercules, neither of them speaking. Everything's changed since the death of John. As they quietly ate, until someone tapped Alex’s shoulder. Alex turned to see Henry Laurens. Alex held in a groan and cleared his throat.
“Y-Yes, sir?”
Alex stammered out. He always seemed to get nervous around him, even if they never spoke. Henry crossed his arms, judging Alex like he had walked in wearing a clown suit.
“What you said up there. About my son.”
Henry managed to make a simple statement sound snarky. Alex internally slapped himself for that.
“Oh, yeah…We were super close, I-”
“Not that.”
Henry interrupted with a scoff, narrowing his eyes.
“The…’I loved him’ part.”
Henry said with a disgusted snarl, making Alex want to fall to hell and die.
“Oh…that. That was platonically.”
Alex mumbled, hoping his blatant lie wasn’t obvious. Henry stood firmly, giving no hint if he believed him or not.
“...mhm…I don’t think it was. You seem like one of those…queers. Like my pathetic son.”
Something at Alex snapped at that. He could handle homophobia even on the worst days, but he wouldn’t let anyone spread slander about John. His John.
“What did you say? Pathetic?”
Alex asked, almost in disbelief. Henry didn’t soften one bit.
“That’s exactly what I said. You gays are always so sensitive, I’m absolutely disappointed that my son died without putting his talents to good use. He could’ve been so much more, but he’s just going to be remembered as a weak pussy-”
Alex didn’t need to hear more before punching the asshole in the face. Shocked gasps filled the venue as Henry fell to the ground, holding his nose that was now dripping blood. Eyes quickly turned to the scene as Henry stood up.
“WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU, BOY?!”
Henry yelled, holding his nose as blood dripped from his hand. Alex had nothing to say, he just glared at him, his fists clenched. After that whole fiasco, he was ‘escorted’ out of the venue, fancy talk for being kicked to the curb. Lafayette and Hercules followed out, fully supporting his decision to lash out on Henry.
Alex stood on the cold sidewalk, the breeze making his blood covered hands ice cold. There was more silence between the three, before Hercules began to speak.
“...He totally deserved that. Mr. Laurens was being such a dick.”
Lafayette nodded in agreement. The three started to walk, hoping they could make it back to the college before class began. More silence, until Lafayette cleared his throat.
“Uh.. I don’t really know if this is the best time to say this, but after Henry I kind of want to tell you guys. I’m nonbinary- I don’t have a lot to say right now, I know we’re all still processing John’s death, but I just wanted you guys to know.”
They said awkwardly as they walked.
“Okay.”
Alex said quietly, the entire funeral scene stuck in his head too much to really think too much about his friend’s coming out. Maybe he shouldn’t have punched Henry. Maybe he shouldn’t have said he loved John in front of everybody. But he didn’t regret any of it one bit.